Friday , June 22, 2018

Custodio: On the road and thinking

WHEN you gotta get away, you do. Some days you really don’t want to, but you have to do. By midweek this week, this has become my predicament. I had really wanted to rest for weeks now but I was busy. There was just a lot to do that going on a short vacation would be unwise. I have to say I am one of those people who constantly suffer from fernweh. I would see friends posting travel photos on the social media walls and I would have that longing for travel. Yes, even if it meant just going to the next town.

There is something about being able to go away that makes is so attractive. Sometimes I ogle at how some of my friends seemed free to travel whenever they want. I know it is not always the case and for some it really is part of their job, but still I get jealous. There are days when all I need was to get sand on my toes and swim in saltwater yet months would pass that I would not even get a glimpse of the sea! And to think, Samal Island is so near!

I guess our busy lives can take so much of our ‘me’ time. Even when we are fully aware that we need time for ourselves, to destress and just unwind, our priorities still take the front seat. Well, most of the time. The thing about adulting is that we need to be mindful of our responsibilities. Right?

So now, I am sort of conflicted since I needed a break and here I am actually on a break. Well, sort of. It is a working (what?) break. You know, the kind when you have the opportunity to have a change of environment BUT you still need to get some work done. Yup, that kind of break. Don’t get me wrong, I am grateful for opportunities like this but well, a real holiday would be so. much better, right? And there is that thing about a break that requires you to be in a specific place at a given time. So you cannot really go gallivanting and exploring. Huhuhu. You then realize that to ‘tour’ the place requires you to really go out of your way to make it happen! Am I making sense at all? Doesn’t it suck when you finally have time for yourself and then realize that your time is really not entirely yours? Isn't that a bummer?

I am on the road with these thoughts on my head, thinking how my life sort of sucks because I can't do what I want. We have been travelling for about 6 hours now and I have experienced rain, fog and the horrible traffic one at a time and all at the same time. It really is enough to get you all worked up about how unlucky one can get with all of these things happening on the one day you are actually free to do what you want, but I remain calm.

I chuckle, shake my head and smile even when we are stuck in traffic. I have managed to push away thoughts of flooding which is a lot, lot scarier here in Manila. Despite of all these ‘shortcomings,’ I still feel blessed. It feels weird that I should react this way even when things aren't really working out for me, but I am thankful.

Yes, the fresh (alive and crawling when I bought it for one hundred pesos this lunchtime) talangka have already stopped moving in the plastic bag. I am also officially hungry and I badly need to pee amidst this crazy parking lot called SLEX but I am actually happy and grateful.

For what?

For the skies clearing although it remains gloomy (but it stopped raining).

For the a ‘moving’ traffic which means I will be home in time for supper with family I have not seen for quite some time now.

For the company of friends whose presence kept me in a good mood.

I am also thankful for the opportunity to learn new things as well as make new friends during the conference I just attended. It was also a chance to bond with old friends and establish a deeper relationship through shared experiences brought about by this "get together."

We can sulk and feel bad about the negative things that happen to us, but we can also choose to look the other way and be thankful for the good graces that has come our way. Choosing to look at what can fuel joy and appreciation beats out all the bad vibes that we tend to dwell on more. Not everything we ask for is granted but we need to appreciate those that have been given, no matter how small. These small victories add up to bigger triumphs that help us appreciate life more. It makes us feel good about ourselves and makes us good examples to other people we know. I hope we all learn to see the goodness in all things small and always find something good in life’s challenges and bad experiences. I think if we do, we survive life’s hurdles better. I think if we strive and work monnit, we become better. It is worth the try so I hope you do!

Happy Sunday!!!