Happiness at work, 2-A A +A
As I See It
Saturday, April 5, 2014
CAN we shift one’s mindset? First you have to identify that mindset. You have to accept it is yours. Review the impact. Choose to retain or choose to create a new mindset.
Studies show that people who forgive are happier and healthier than those who hold resentments. When people think about forgiving an offender it leads to improved functioning in their cardiovascular and nervous system. Another study at the University of Wisconsin found out that the more forgiving people suffered less from a wide range of illnesses. The less forgiving people have been reported to have greater number of health problems.
Recall a most significant incident when you forgave someone or you were forgiven by someone. What did you feel and how did you move on from there? Is there anyone you want to forgive? Your boss, your mayor, your fellow employee, your partner, your son, your parents...? Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass it is about learning how to dance in the rain.
What are the indicators of a healthy organization? Internal concerns are handled with urgency. Feedback is viewed as a powerful learning tool. Breakdowns are handled as they happen. Non-defensiveness or blaming is caught and minimized; the focus is on solutions. Spontaneous creative solutions are applied. There is fun and enjoyment. The sense of community is cultured.
It is better if the person concerned knows and identifies core emotions: anger, sadness, fear, sorrow, love, joy, sexy feelings, and surprise. In our work, we encounter stressful situation (don’t call it anxiety . . . it may not be anxiety). Explore the stressful situation. Ask yourself honestly. What am I feeling? What’s happening? What am I focusing on? Accept the situation and what you are currently experiencing. You may cry. There is nothing wrong in crying. Accept what it is you are focusing on.
Shift to an entirely new focus. What new focus can I create that will enable me to deal with this situation powerfully. Express the shift. Do what will work for you. Try forgiving if someone has offended you. Say what you want to say. Take a walk. Do stress exercise. (You have to learn that.) Breathe deeply. Shifting could be done easily if you have trained yourself to have ER or emotional resilience. ER is the collection of skills, characteristics, habits, and outlooks that make it possible to remain maximally flexible and fresh in the face of stress.
Emotional resilience is our ability to spring back emotionally after suffering through difficult and stressful situations in our life. Stressed people experience a flood of powerful negative emotions which may include anger, anxiety, and depression. Some people remain trapped in these negative emotions long after the stressful events that have caused them have passed. Emotionally resilient people, on the other hand, are quickly able to bounce back to their normal emotional state.
What should be the attitudes of emotionally resilient people? Show good judgment and problem-solving skills. Be persistent and determined. Be responsible and thoughtful rather than impulsive. Be effective communicator with skills in handling others. Learn from the past experience so as not to repeat mistakes. Be emphatic toward other people. Have a social conscience (caring about the welfare of others). Feel good about themselves as persons. Feel like they are in control of their lives. Know that they are optimistic, not pessimistic.
How would you live your life if you knew you were already happy? Be sunshine to others. Let your positive energy radiate. Contaminate other people with your optimism. The office is your family while at work. Make a great difference in your simple life. Be a model of a happy human being. Your office mates will find out the reason for your being like that. Behave by example.
Maintain a happy life. Prepare your “Happiness Contract.” Follow religiously what is in the contract. Be consistently consistent in your consistencies. Be an advocate of happiness. If you are really that serious, you can even make your “Happiness Calendar.” You can be totally happy for 365 days in a year. In your calendar, don’t forget to include your “Act of Kindness.” Kindness begins with you and starts at home. Pass it forward to your dog, to the orchid near your gate, to the street children, to the street cleaners.
Don’t just stop there. Allow kindness to reach your mayor, your governor, and even the president. Kindness is not expensive. It is worth who you are.
Published in the Sun.Star Bacolod newspaper on April 06, 2014.