MY FAVORITE definition of love is, “It is a feeling between two hearts decorated with pity, quarrel, and reconciliation.” This definition gave me three children. It is still a part of my advocacy and it gives me (still) “bounce back ability.”
On Valentine’s Day, we remember Cupid. His is the God of erotic love who in Western art is portrayed as a mischievous boy or young man with wings and a quiver who shoots arrows into the hearts of the mortals. “Gold-tipped arrows” are for love and “lead-tipped arrows” are for hate.
Once (before my marriage), my Hindu friend in the teaching profession taught me “sexual variety” from Ananga Ranga, an Indian love manual for married couples… monkey, crab, splitting bamboo, etc. “These positions keep a relationship alive!” It made me laugh but I did not try one. A combination of all those is more effective.
Valentine’s Day is about love… boy and girl, man and woman. Sometimes you just have to accept that some people can only be in your heart, but not in your life. Love is full of challenges. You may or you may not make it. Expecting is the crime; disappointment is the punishment. In loving, you have to learn to live half alive.
Don’t be a road-ender in love. When life throws you lemons just bring out the tequila. Even the gays have their personal involvement in love (no hiding of self). When asked, “Are you gay or straight?” The expected possible answer is, “Straight, straight girl!” He cannot hide that he is “gay positive”.
On Valentine’s Day (or even before), you should do some soul-searching. Who knows, you might find one yourself. Do not trust in front of the mirror. Mirrors don’t talk and they don’t laugh either. Men should know their roles… boys, too. On this day boys want to be popular. Men seek to be respected. Boys make girls laugh (or cry). Men make ladies moan and scream.
It cannot be avoided. Someone has to chase and someone would love to get caught, or it could be the other way around. That could be bad. If what is expected did not materialize, someone would insult and some would be insulted. If you are insulted by someone who is the object of your love…think positive. “Your insult would hurt me more if it were grammatically correct. Hating me won’t make me ugly; and it won’t make you pretty either.
Old men may have a different interpretation of Valentine’s Day. They would like to believe that their once “strong dinosaur” is already extinct. They can still be productive by thinking of their beautiful women in the past and say, “They are frigid and mine is rigid.” It goes without saying that you could plant bacon and it would grow into a Bacon Tree. Just pick them all when they are crunchy already.
A husband and a wife may go out on Valentine’s Day for a change. If they decide to stay at home to avoid traffic congestion, that could be perfect. They should simply lock the master’s bedroom so that the children could not disturb them. Don’t forget to write this outside the door, Crime Scene: Do Not Enter. It is effective. You can cross your heart and hope to die.
For the old maids, you may be single but desperate. Accept the fact that you are like a beer… super dry but someone have to prove it. If you don’t, you are a field of roses wasted on you. You can try and tell me later on. I wish you all the best of luck!
Mall dating is a fad on Valentine’s Day. When you see a “hot chick” with a super ugly boyfriend that is not a relationship; that is a hostage situation! One can make many conclusions. Love doesn’t die. It can only be silenced. When love is no longer blind, it doesn’t like what it sees. It could be that one loves too much, and the other loves too many.
Love for each other should not die but it does not always work that way. Love dies when you now ask, “Why?” Later, you will ask, “Why not?” Sometimes, it slowly dies with every pound she gains. Love dies (to a man) when you can no longer offer any “wood” that will keep the “fire” burning. Love may die to make room for a new one. Love is flexible as that.
In the family, love dies because you let it. It could die because of two women (third party) standing in between the husband and wife… Mis(s) communication and Mis(s) understanding. Husband and wife should remove the “tangled wires” in their life. They should tell each other, “You are really hard… to be forgotten. You are my “happiest hello” and my “saddest goodbye.”
In itself, love is not perfect. Make it perfect. To fall in love is awfully simple; to fall out of love is simply awful. Some good things never last, most don’t even start. Start loving and make it last. Happy Valentine’s Day!
Published in the SunStar Bacolod newspaper on February 13, 2018.
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