So I became a ‘Critic’-A A +A
Sunday, October 21, 2012
I’M DEFINITELY no pundit and in no position to do this but this is just one of those things that tick one to productively rant, if ever there’s such a case. So give me this pass lest I would never have my peace for not rebuking today’s touted modern literature.
I’m so glad I didn’t have the money to buy acclaimed bestsellers. Because if I did, I might end up regretting spending on what would turn out to be a total disappointment. As one who could not resist the hype of a good read, I’m still glad I have that miniscule patience to wait for downloadable PDF versions. So even after the buzz around 50 Shades of Grey has ebbed down, I was excited to start reading the free version from the net anticipating a romantic page-turner set in modern times.
With a big bag of Doritos, I was prepared to do an all-nighter but ended up yawning on page 43 and realized that my attention was more transfixed on the shadows created by the lampshade. It was more fascinating staring into unmoving shadows than immersing myself into this erotic plot revolving around a very underdeveloped female protagonist (not to mention awkward, unsure and uncomfortable in her own skin; talk about Bella Uninteresting Swan) and this creepy out-of-this-world male domineering freak. Now I can honestly say that the huge hype, translated into mere overrated flimflam, is just because of the porno reference that the novel has. Indeed, sex sells.
The tragic fact which I cannot fathom is how a weak plot that drones on about a distorted perception of love and relationship can sell like pancakes and surpass something like the Harry Awesome Potter Series and the Da Vinci Brilliant Code. Okay, let’s say millions of mommies and teens alike dig erotica. But does that mean those same millions tolerate the bitter and disappointing message that the trilogy transcends to women about bondage, dominance, submission, sadism and masochism, a story that discounts the value of emotion and love within a relationship, something that borders on plain mental illness.
It’s saddening. It’s maddening. A story like this really deserved that kind of rave? Whatever happened to feminism, empowerment and the mere presence of self-respect? And to think that this comes in three installments? Oh em! More Fifty Shades of Mental Illness! Que horror!
I’m no literary expert and I don’t even have a Mickey Mouse license to do a book review. I’m simply a bookworm who feels like I’ve been cheated from an anticipated reader’s high. And I will not really mind that much if I can just ignore the fact that a lot of women (and even men) actually enjoyed a sick depiction of a supposed romantic piece.
I’m still young, inexperienced, and still has a lot to learn and understand about the ways of the world; a lot to comprehend about the complexities of womanhood, relationships and love, young but not naïve enough to realize that it’s spankbusters like these that make a lot of women romantically helpless, if not deranged about how giving and taking should be when it comes to intimate partnerships.
You know the type where the reviews and critics given by the experts or even crusty, old curmudgeons are far more interesting to read than the spankbuster, I mean, bestseller itself. This is definitely one of those. To the fans, my apologies. You can shoot me. But that won’t make me change my stance. I am in no position to burst your bubbles about the existence of Christian Greys in this world. I just didn’t think that “romantic-erotic-what-have-yous” can become synonymous with ridiculous, till now.
Published in the Sun.Star Baguio newspaper on October 22, 2012.