From the old to the New Year

IT WAS a hard decision. For the most part, it was painful. And if I have to look back to try to see what I can brand as “good memories”, I could have just stored them in disks long mislaid. I could have made more reasons to pretend they are still loved but are nowhere to be found.

Now, the melodramatic stage is definitely over. I am glad the bangs and the booms that ushered 2013 kept ghosts of the past from coming back.

I believe the fireworks took them away just as how the once dazzling lights in the heavens vanished into thin air the very first minutes of the New Year. (How I wish it was that easy.)

It was also the changing of the year that made me realize one important thing in life – that I should not be afraid to let go and that the only way to begin is to end.

I have kept love for so long that I refused when I felt it wanted to leave. I thought it was the best thing to do but I was wrong. It started to ruin everything it built. It started to destroy what was left.

It needed time, so much time that it waited for the change in people (just like the changing of years) to set itself free. It happened still – in the last months, days, and hours of 2012.

So finally, I ended to begin.

And although I know that starting over was quite as tough, I need to live – I have to try (to love again).

After all, I realized that I don’t need new years to start anew. I only need myself back to keep the sanity in me and to remind me that there is more to life than heartbreaks and broken dreams.

This time, I know I have to close my eyes one more time to feel that I am whole again.

The passing and the coming of years tells us that we should welcome love when it arrives, savor its days, but be ready to say goodbye when it finally decides to leave.

And just like love, the years will be defined by how we make the most in each months and days.

Well, I guess I just have to be hopeful as what this New Year brings to most people. Besides, I have found a good reason to begin again.