Sira-sira store: PDAF demystified (the lighter side)-A A +A
By Ober Khok
Friday, August 23, 2013
THERE'S so much noise about the Priority Assistance Development Fund (PDAF) that it’s starting to ruin my breakfast, lunch and dinner.
Lest you think I am a callow and a calloused fellow, I care where the Pork Barrel (money to an ordinary person like me) fund goes, how it is used and how many people are benefited.
The acronym poses an abstract idea about taxes. To the a nerd like me who has the nerve to tackle this national issue, it is difficult to understand the concept of PDAF even if I have been told that the Pork Barrel (PB) sustains this fund.
PB (not pork and beans) is the appropriation of government spending for localized projects secured solely or primarily to bring money to a representative’s district.
That’s according to wikipedia, but according to me—I don’t understand the definition.
It’s buried in abstract ideas like localized and representative. For all I know, the “representative” is a cousin of the politician or the “localized” is somewhere in the States. I also don’t understand why millions of pesos go to the hands of a few, who are tasked to make laws in the first place.
“Ah, we have too many laws already and the money is there,” Uncle Gustav replied.
But since I also like to play with words and honestly want to make Saturdays lighter and brighter, I have decided to find the real meaning of PDAF to make it more understandable for my fellow citizens, as some politicians like to say.
PDAF means Pilfering, Divesting, Acquiring and Fixing. This is something someone in power might do when he meets with a mountain of money. Of course, I have to add the safety net word “alleged.” A person is innocent until proven otherwise, so the other wise thing to do is to flee the country. “Allegedly flee” the country (or fled the country—I hate grammar and syntax).
Another meaning of PDAF is Pirmi Delayed Ang Funding, like those for road works or the repair of damaged roads. People bear with dusty roads during summer and muddy streets when the rains come down.
“After all, the Pinoy is a happy person. He can roll with the punches,” my friend Illustracio said.
Personal Development Always First is yet another meaning of PDAF. My aunt, Tita Blitte, wonders where some ordinary politicos get the money to build huge houses, go on European vacations, buy tons of jewelry and throw lavish parties. Right. Where?
I can call the kettle dirty because given a chance, I can be a dirty kettle pot. Anyway, the other meaning of PDAF is Preference Directed At Family, but of course. I mean, it’s charity begins at home and that’s can be a big home.
People Desire Advancing Fast especially if it’s advancing cash to another bank for some “localized” project. It can also mean that people want to move upward in society, the faster the better. The best vehicle is tons of money.
Perfectly Doctored Accounts Folder can refer to the “localized” project—allegedly ghost projects like non-government organizations that don’t exist or beneficiaries that are in name only.
It’s really more fun in the Philippines because Pilipinos Daghan Ang Fun, like making fun of a serious issue only because it is the easier way to swallow something so bitter.
Published in the Sun.Star Cebu newspaper on August 24, 2013.