Singlestalk: Cold Christmas?-A A +A
Saturday, December 21, 2013
Michelle: Life has certainly been different for me this year. With all the changes and new events that happened, it’s been a roller-coaster ride—fun, exciting, a bit scary sometimes but definitely something to look forward to. Whatever our Christmas plans, I’m sure of is that I won’t be alone but will be in the midst of all the family revelry.
Things might be a bit harder if one is all alone this Christmas. Although there are a lot of options on what to do; a party of one might be a bit lonely.
DJ: Yup, three more days and it will be Christmas. It’s understandable if there are singles out there who are gripped by fear. Aside from family gatherings, December is also a popular month to get married and thus attending wedding receptions become the norm.
Singles like me are more exposed to being frequently asked questions like, why I am still a best man and not yet the groom, as if it is a problem that needs to be solved. The funny thing is that they really wait for the answer.
While I’m getting used to this, I do still wonder why being alone appears to be a cause of anxiety this season, and why some people think one is stuck in a rut if one is still single.
M: What I found strange when I was still single was why married people are very concerned about one’s single status as if being single was a bane or a burden. The truth is one’s state of life, whether single or married will be a burden if one is discontent with what he or she has.
It’s no assurance that if you’re married, you’ll have the best holidays ever. I mean, what if one doesn’t get along with his or her in-laws?
Can you imagine the horror of having a queso de bola thrown your way or being pelted with last year’s fruitcake?! Or what if you don’t get along with your spouse and would rather poison his eggnog rather than kiss him under the mistletoe?
Happiness is a choice.
Enjoying the holidays is a decision, whether you’re single or married.
DJ: If someone’s spending Christmas alone this year, here’s what I suggest: (1) Invite your folks to come over. Your folks are not getting any younger. This could be the best time to let them know how much they mean to you and/or realize how much you really mean to them. (2) Do something for others. The act of giving is an opportunity to forget our worries and realize there is a world out there that needs a lot of saving.
There are several evacuation centers around the city for survivors of super typhoon Yolanda like the sports center in Barangay Tinago. Sharing our resources, including our time, can go a long way. (3) Do the things you missed doing when you were still in a relationship. Have the remote control all for yourself and switch channel whenever you want!
Isn’t that cool? Organize a dinner with other single friends. Go out. Try a new sport. Meet people and make new friends.
Being alone doesn’t have to mean you are lonely. Who knows? An end to a relationship usually opens to a bigger arena that draws a person to a new experience. The past will continue to be the future if you drag it along with you.
It’s when one fully accepts that a relationship has come to a dead end when one will have the resolve to finally move on.
M: And if ever you have no one to be PDA (Public Display of Affection) with this Christmas, don’t let the chill of Christmas dawn bring you down. You can have your early morning novena mass with pama-init all to yourself with the exciting possibility of developing a relationship with the sleepy person next to you who dozed on your shoulder the whole time both of you were standing in a jam-packed church. The possibilities are endless!
It’s actually exciting to be single this Christmas!
DJ: So just chill and flash that megawatt smile! Attitude, as we have heard time and again, is essential to the good life, to living well.
Happiness does not necessarily come from being in a committed relationship. It comes from reaching a point of contentment.
Count your blessings. Remember the Reason for the season. Ponder on His great love story. It is only in Him and through Him can we truly have the warmest and blessed Christmas ever, rain or shine, hot or cold!
Published in the Sun.Star Cebu newspaper on December 22, 2013.