Songs that are NOT wedding-friendly

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Tuesday, May 20, 2014


THE month of May is about to end, and with that, plans for wedding schedules are all out in the open. This is true, most especially when these ceremonies are most popular in June every year.

Anyway, besides all the stellar things which make a wedding so heartwarmingly special (not to mention becoming another venue to come up with 101 photos you could post on Instagram), there is another aspect people involved with the whole production should pay attention to: the music.

Yes, from the musical score the bride chooses to walk down the aisle with—or what music ends up being played in the background while hundreds of people skip the salads and proceed to attacking the roast pig at the end of the buffet line during the reception—the musical element to this once-in-a-lifetime gathering is something worth taking the effort to perfect.

And then there are times the wedding singer dedicates a song to the newlyweds, or sweeter, the groom (or bride) dedicates a song for his or her better half. These are the times that make the crowd silent in admiration for the for the love between bride and groom.

Not unless it’s the wrong song.

Yes, the crowd will still be silent. But minds all over the room will travel far and wide, searching through the confines of their memory and logic banks, trying to figure out why a particular song just doesn’t jive right in the mix of matrimony.

Singers beware, here are some songs that sound sweet to the ear but are not quite perfect as that wedding cake on the corner. Not unless it’s some clever parody done on purpose for some laughs (and there better be emphasis on that.)

Every Breath You Take

Cool as the morning breeze, the snare drum sounds fat and the guitars just do enough to get you grooving. This hit by The Police, although it sounds really great, is as sinister as a serial criminal’s favorite song. It as if Sting, when he wrote this, had a stalker’s to-do list in front of him. As the lyrics suggest:

“Every breath you take. Every move you make. Every bond you break. Every step you
take. I’ll be watching you.”

Even Sting himself explained it best on an American radio talk show.

“One couple told me ‘Oh we love that song; it was the main song played at our wedding!’ I thought, ‘Well, good luck.’”

He adds during an interview with BBC Radio 2, “I think the song is very, very sinister and ugly and people have actually misinterpreted it as being a gentle little love song, when it’s quite the opposite.”

It Might Be You

This hit from the film Tootsie starring Dustin Hoffman is a heartwarmer. Set the emotional microwave at 9 and let your chest feel all the love. Popularized by Stephen Bishop, Filipinos love this song, just as like any other ballad. But then people might think twice about singing this on a wedding, especially the groom. The general message of the lyrics is as indecisive as some circus novice treading the high wire. You’re in your wedding day, and you’re singing, “It might be you?” Again, proceed with caution.

I Will Survive

Usually, by the end of the reception when people are all in high spirits and have had their fill of the food as well, the show band kicks in with a wicked dance playlist.

Then the most popular Am chord used in all history of music kicks in, and the lady vocalist belts out: “At first I was afraid, I was petrified!”
If you’re particular about lyrics, you’d know this song is an anthem for post-breakup depression. Do not sing this at a wedding.

Saving All My Love For You.

This hit popularized by Whitney Houston sounds so sexy, that presenting this during the reception is almost a good warm-up to a couple’s wedding night. But then this proves the point that song lyrics actually mean something and that one great line doesn’t define an entire track’s message. It’s obvious if you know the lyrics well.

The verse goes:

“A few stolen moments are all that we share. You’ve got your family, and they need you there. Though I’ve tried to resist, being last on your list. But no other man’s gonna do. So I’m saving all my love for you”

My Heart Will Go On

Celine Dion has raked in big bucks with her amazing voice. One may feel the urge to sing this song as a declaration of unwavering love. But this super powerful ballad, which is from the OST for the blockbuster movie Titanic, is dedicated to a dead lover.

So don’t even think about it.

Published in the Sun.Star Cebu newspaper on May 21, 2014.

Lifestyle

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