Janellie Tam

MORE than 19 months ago, I got on my very first carousel ride of a lifetime. The roller coaster. It was a mixture of emotions as I anxiously waited for my turn. I was without a doubt excited, yet fear was inevitable for risks were obviously on the line.

This most anticipated ride in the carnival is prone to possible injuries and casualties. It’s ironic how people still want to get on it despite their knowledge of the danger to the passengers. I knew what to expect. I knew what was coming my way. Or so I thought. And then it was time to finally take my seat.

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As I was assisted in it, I was instructed to put on my seatbelt, and then the ride was closed for any more passengers.

That was it. There was no more turning back, but I felt like I had to. Fear had gotten over me once again and yet I wanted to take the risk. The thrill, the excitement that the ride was thought to bring was just exhilirating. I was pretty sure I couldn’t find it elsewhere. The guy assigned to the roller coaster ride already gave the signal to start the engines, and so it did.

The first few seconds were pretty much just like a fast car ride, flat and too familiar, but getting there. I wanted to jump to the climax of the ride, but the roller coaster follows a path specially designed for it to trail on. Slowly now, then faster. The twists and swerves were exhilarating. Because of the overwhelming thrill, I thought my heart was going to burst anytime soon. It was beating hard and fast like a fast dripping faucet unable to cease the flow of water. Just as we were about to reach the turn-arounds, technical difficulties happened twice or thrice. The ride had to be stopped in the middle of the ride while we were in it! It was crazy! I couldn’t hold back my anxiety and tears as I held on tight to the sides of my seat. I kept praying to God not to take me away just yet. I still had dreams I want edto make real.

I just had to stay. Ever since, God has never failed to hear my prayers and not once has He left me on my own. While on the very top of the roller coaster, I couldn’t help wishing that I’d just get it over with that very second. But at the same time, I longed to enjoy the rest of the experience. It’s a once-in-a-lifetime chance.

I thought it best to give it a try and just make the most out of it. I chose to be there; I had to finish what I started.

I decided to wait up until the engines caught power again. And the ride continued. But something caught me the moment the roller coaster began to move again. What was once there seemed to have vanished into thin air. I felt like the spirit of the ride had been sucked by the engines that gave it power to operate. It simply just wasn’t the same anymore. Maybe because the momentum was abruptly stopped, and it’s never easy to catch the same fire again. The roller coaster slowed down as we were nearing the station where it all started. The person manning the ride again gave a signal. This time, we were asked to vacate the seats of the ride. I was still in my right mind to actually figure out that he really meant my turn had expired.

For a year, 7 months, and 5 days, I’ve been given the opportunity to be on what was the sweetest, most unforgettable roller coaster ride in my entire life! And now that I’ve reached the limit of my time, I have to get through the most bitter ordeal of simply accepting the fact that just like any carnival ride, it has reached its end. It was really over.

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