A dream

SEVERAL weeks ago, I had a dream. I remember it quite clearly because it had this effect on me. Actually it was quite short.

I was walking along some road, it was getting dark. I guess it was dusk. Suddenly, I found myself doing The Way of The Cross. So while I was praying a priest comes up and asks me: Rene I am the one who is going to do your mass right? Your wedding anniversary mass. I did not answer and I just found myself hugging the priest. When I turned to my right, I saw my late father. He was smiling, as if to say that he was happy to see me. (My father has this wonderful smile!)

And then he eagerly says: Rene, Rene is that you? I was so glad to see him and I just nodded. Then he says something: May utang pa ako sa iyo. Then he hands me a check. I remember the figure vividly. It really stuck in my head. After he had done so, he just disappears and suddenly one of my siblings comes up to me and asks me to sign some papers. End of dream.

When I woke up I was trying to figure out what this meant. The last time I visited my father’s grave was about some weeks back. I go there sometimes when I need to tell him things, when I need to share things. Or when I am just confused. The last time I was there was because I had to tell him a rather unbelievable story. But I guess he knows about that anyway. I just needed to tell him because it concerned him. (One of these days I shall write about it!) In the meantime back to the story!

So there I was thinking of what to make of the dream. I told my wife about it and she said two interesting things. She said even in dreams Daddy still is generous. Even in your dreams Daddy still shares. I could not help but smile at her interpretation. And then she said something about the other part of the signing of the papers. But let us reserve that for another day.

But you know it really is true. My father was a compassionate and generous man. He was never selfish or greedy. My father was transparent. He wore his heart on his sleeve. With him there were no pretensions and he was someone who stood by his word. He stood for truth and he did not manipulate stories to his advantage.

What my father said, my father did. That was why his employees loved him so much. That was why his friends were true friends of his. My father was not a hypocrite. He was a proud yet humble man. The last thing my father wanted was publicity. He never went around town telling stories. He never talked about himself or tried to project himself because everyone knew who he was.

And he had a giving heart. That was why in that dream it is no surprise that he still looked out for my welfare. He did not forget. What makes this whole thing curious is the figure. I can really remember the numbers. I wonder what that figure symbolizes. Sounds intriguing, sounds mysterious.

I read somewhere that your dreams are a product of your subconscious. That sometimes dreams give you messages. That signing of the papers part that is not a mystery. That is easy to comprehend. That is not a mystery at all. In fact I can tell you exactly what that means but as I said I shall reserve that for another day.

What really intrigues me is the timing of this all. As I said something happened that concerns him immensely. I wonder what my father was telling me in that dream. I rarely dream of him and for this to happen now makes me think. And wonder.

But it also gives me a warm feeling because when I visited his grave I distinctly told him, you have to help me here. I am against something unbelievable. I prayed to him and asked for his guidance because of what happened. But, I guess he knows that. Perhaps that is why he appeared to me in a dream. Perhaps that is why he asked: Rene is that you? Yes Dad, this is me.