To pursue new things-A A +A
Saturday, January 12, 2013
OKAY. So the New Year has begun! Yipee to those who have managed to still keep their resolutions intact. Bravo! I am sort of somewhere in the middle, keeping some and losing some of it in the first few days of the year.
But that's okay! We should not waste time regretting the things we are not able to do for now. There are 12 months in a year and I don't think there is anything wrong with giving it another try somewhere along the succeeding months.
I have promised myself not to be too obsessive about keeping my resolutions because honestly, the more I become preoccupied with it, the less chance I have to actually achieve it! That is why the past years prior to 2012 have been unsuccessful for me -- I had too many resolutions and it didn't help that they were rather idealistic!
So if you're still hanging on to some of your New Year's resolutions, that's fine. If you don't have any left or if you never made any at all, at one point, that can even be better! It gives you an opportunity to address coming priorities as you see fit and best for yourself! Then you wouldn't have to deal with the guilt of abandoning any goals you have set out to do in the beginning of the year.
I have decided to be kinder to myself. Be more forgiving of my shortcomings and flaws. It is not easy, especially when you grew up to be your worst critic! There is always a tendency to shut out any possibilities of actually trying new things just because of the simple fact that you don’t think that you will be good enough to try. Yes, it's pathetic and for other people who are on the outside looking in, it can be mean, but it happens.
But still you can try. No harm there. So, I am trying this year. I am trying so hard that I can proudly say that I’ve recently taken up painting! I used to draw until I was about eight years old but somehow, I stopped and decided I couldn't draw at all totally ignoring the fact that although there are those who are naturally gifted when it comes to art, you can learn in with constant practice and perseverance. I have to admit that I am quite an impatient person, wanting results at the snap of my fingers but I also realized that clearly, there are things that take time to develop or achieve. I needed to learn patience too.
So far, so good. I do have my own demons whispering, and even mocking my efforts (especially in art) in my recent endeavours but well, I push on and remind myself that this time, I am doing this for myself! We are all heroes in some way, putting other people's welfare and feelings ahead of ourselves and sometimes, we feel that our lives have ceased to be what we envisioned it to be and instead of feeling good about our achievements, we feel stuck and that something seems to be missing.
I felt that way for a long time and it was quite a lonely and aimless journey. Of course there were good days but the great ones come much less and farther in between. I would catch myself thinking back to the good old days when everything seemed simpler and happier. Then I would ask: "What the hell happened to me? Where did all the fun and contentment go?"
Well, I figured it was because I had become so immersed in all the things that the world expected of me as an adult that I have forgotten that part of me will always remain a child, who needs to be continuously amused and entertained so that I can be whole-heartedly happy. Part of me still needs to discover new things so that there is always something to look forward to every single day.
We should never forget how it feels like to be excited about a new thing. How we gush at the thought of pursuing a long-standing dream. To feel your heart skip a beat when you’re face to face with the possibility of actually getting something new done is just priceless! You would actually feel your body and soul come alive from the just knowing that the moment has come and that you’re finally getting the chance to live out a fantasy or making a dream come true!
I blushed just thinking of that moment when I can say that I have really done it! It is always hardest in taking the first step towards it but when you do, it feels absolutely fulfilling! It may be scary at times and sometimes there are challenges that make you want to quit all over again but remember, you deserve the chance to do something for yourself!
Short of becoming cheesy and too melodramatic, I firmly believe that it is good for the soul. Putting yourself first gives you that inner glow that somehow, radiates outwards and affects the people around you in a positive way!! Much as the same way other people appreciate the good things that you can do for them, I learned that we need to pat ourselves in the back too, by allowing ourselves the time to explore and learn new things that we’ve always wanted to do but never did.
If you've always dreamed of learning how to do the tango, or sing or paint -- Go Ahead! You may want to dabble in the theater, take up wake boarding or travel more often -- Do It! Want to read that novel that’s been gathering dust on your desk (or somewhere in your room) for years or go back to school to get a Master's Degree or probably even teach--Why Not? It will be fun! It will be exciting! And it will be good for you!
Happy Sunday everyone!
Published in the Sun.Star Davao newspaper on January 13, 2013.