‘Undas’ tells a lot about us-A A +A
Bahin sang Bubay
Saturday, November 2, 2013
OUR practices as Filipinos make us distinct from other races, even if there are certain norms in our culture that are similar to our Asian neighbors. To really understand why we are like this and that, we must consider our past and our present, because there are obtaining conditions and factors, be it outside or inside influence, which makes change a little bit difficult.
Our penchant for sad stories, for instance, in teleseryes, clearly illustrates the way we consider the negative circumstances in our life. Psychologists would see it as our inability to forgive, come to terms with our selves or to put to rest something that hurt us or cause pain in our psyche. It’s an attitude that chose to linger on the “feeling” of injury, or that invisible wound that heals longer than it should.
We love to dwell on the “drama”, perhaps not so much for the purpose of calling attention to ourselves, but sometimes the “habit” is difficult to lose because it is already ingrained in us. It’s almost like an addiction, such that one has to undergo rehabilitation and re-orientation to be able to help ourselves get back to “normal”.
Can we change? Humans that we are, we can easily transform, simply if we want to, if we have the will-power to see things through and convince ourselves that we are past such kind of attitude, and that it is no longer helpful in our development as a human being.
Easily said than done, I guess.
Between the two sexes, women are more prone to this kind of attitude since it had been ingrained in us. This is to a large part, due to society’s influence and the dictates of our culture, then and now.
Most often women are left in the home to do, among other things, endless household chores that are not even considered productive work, as the “simple housewife” connotes. When housewives are asked about their occupation, they would automatically say “none, only a housewife”, in effect demeaning the gargantuan tasks involved in the role of keeping the family knitted together.
It’s an effort for me sometimes to stop myself from correcting women when they consider themselves as “only that” of their “noble” but unpaid labor in the home, partly because it is true that housework is unpaid, and, again, because our culture has embedded it on our psyche. Though nowadays, there are a growing number of women who simply refused to end up thinking that her role is confined only in the home.
Moreover, many among “our” generation have finally freed ourselves from that invisible bondage that has kept women bound by that intangible iron chain she has inherited from her ancestors. One can now see middle-aged women bonding on a night out, sipping a little booze and just having fun, no matter what.
It really feels good to hear the women’s laughter ringing out loud, as they sing and dance together into the dead of night...
Published in the Sun.Star Davao newspaper on November 02, 2013.