15 things to give up to be happy

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By Joel M. Mendoza

The Scribe's Corner

Sunday, December 8, 2013


DIRECTOR’S Cut: (This portion features the thoughts of DepEd 11 Regional Director Gloria D. Benigno, CESO IV to all stakeholders and recipients of the efforts to improve the basic education) "I am your team leader, you are my team mates, together, let us work as a team.”

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Dana Saviuc, from purposefairy.com enumerated 15 things to give up to make us happy. These are the following.

1. Give up your need to always be right. There are so many of us who can’t stand the idea of being wrong wanting to always be right even at the risk of ending great relationships or causing a great deal of stress and pain, for us and for others. It’s just not worth it.

2. Give up your need for control. Be willing to give up your need to always control everything that happens to you and around you situations, events, people, etc. Whether they are loved ones, co-workers, or just strangers you meet on the street just allow them to be. Allow everything and everyone to be just as they are and you will see how much better will that make you feel.

3. Give up on blame. Give up on your need to blame others for what you have or don’t have, for what you feel or don’t feel. Stop giving your powers away and start taking responsibility for your life.

4. Give up your self-defeating self-talk. Oh my. How many people are hurting themselves because of their negative, polluted and repetitive self-defeating mindset? Don’t believe everything that your mind is telling you especially if it’s negative and self-defeating. You are better than that.

5. Give up your limiting beliefs. It is about what you can or cannot do, about what is possible or impossible. From now on, you are no longer going to allow your limiting beliefs to keep you stuck in the wrong place. Spread your wings and fly!

6. Give up complaining. Give up your constant need to complain about those many, many, many things people, situations, events that make you unhappy, sad and depressed. Nobody can make you unhappy, no situation can make you sad or miserable unless you allow it to. It’s not the situation that triggers those feelings in you, but how you choose to look at it. Never underestimate the power of positive thinking.

7. Give up the luxury of criticism. Give up your need to criticize things, events or people that are different than you. We are all different, yet we are all the same. We all want to be happy, we all want to love and be loved and we all want to be understood. We all want something, and something is wished by us all.

8. Give up your need to impress others. Stop trying so hard to be something that you’re not just to make others like you. It doesn’t work this way. The moment you stop trying so hard to be something that you’re not, the moment you take off all your masks, the moment you accept and embrace the real you, you will find people will be drawn to you, effortlessly.

9. Give up your resistance to change. Change is good. Change will help you move from A to B. Change will help you make improvements in your life and also the lives of those around you. Follow your bliss, embrace change don’t resist it.

10. Give up labels. Stop labeling those things, people or events that you don’t understand as being weird or different and try opening your mind, little by little. Minds only work when open.

11. Give up on your fears.. Fear is just an illusion, it doesn’t exist you created it. It’s all in your mind. Correct the inside and the outside will fall into place.

12. Give up your excuses. Send them packing and tell them they’re fired. You no longer need them. A lot of times we limit ourselves because of the many excuses we use. Instead of growing and working on improving ourselves and our lives, we get stuck, lying to ourselves, using all kind of excuses that 99.9% of the time are not even real.

13. Give up the past. I know, I know. It’s hard. Especially when the past looks so much better than the present and the future looks so frightening, but you have to take into consideration the fact that the present moment is all you have and all you will ever have. The past you are now longing for the past that you are now dreaming about was ignored by you when it was present.

14. Give up attachment. This is a concept that, for most of us is so hard to grasp and I have to tell you that it was for me too, (it still is) but it’s not something impossible. You get better and better at with time and practice. The moment you detach yourself from all things, (and that doesn’t mean you give up your love for them because love and attachment have nothing to do with one another, attachment comes from a place of fear.

15. Give up living your life to other people’s expectations

Way too many people are living a life that is not theirs to live. They live their lives according to what others think is best for them, they live their lives according to what their parents think is best for them, to what their friends, their enemies and their teachers, their government and the media think is best for them. They ignore their inner voice, that inner calling. They are so busy with pleasing everybody, with living up to other people’s expectations, that they lose control over their lives. They forget what makes them happy, what they want, what they need and eventually they forget about themselves. You have one life this one right now you must live it, own it, and especially don’t let other people’s opinions distract you from your path.

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You can access DepEd Updates, latest issuances, photos and other relevant information through our website: region11.deped.gov.ph and our Facebook Page: http://www.facebook.com/deped.regionxi. For comments, suggestions and/or contributions, send your email to depedregion11@gmail.com. For queries, complains and other concerns, call DepEd Region 11 at (082) 227-9342 or fax to (082) 227-1102 and (082) 221-6147.

Published in the Sun.Star Davao newspaper on December 09, 2013.

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