Seeing the good

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By Stella A. Estremera

Spider’s web

Saturday, December 28, 2013


"HALA KA, ma'am, uy! Sinabi ko baya yan sa iyo sa interview pa lang (I told that story to you during my interview)," a former reporter said while she was talking about some bad turns in her life in what was once our regular laughter-filled ponderings about life drinking session.

"I told you, I don't remember bad things about people," I replied.

She gawked but chose to be quiet after seeing the blank look on my face. No recall.

I don't know when it started, but somewhere in my adulthood, my memory refused to recall bad things of people. For those who really did something bad to me, I simply forget the person even existed. Ergo, no more bad memories!

Many refuse to believe it. I let them be. How can I explain something I can't even explain. Maybe my brain is reserving the little left and so junks anything that drags me down. Believe me when I say, I've been dragged down and battered a lot, I'm one big set of scars (bilbil and all). But only the scars remain, the sword-wielder forgotten.

Another friend, after our semi-regular wine session brought me home, telling me about the bad turns in his life that has kept him awake at nights.

I looked at him and asked, "You have a choice. You worry and lose sleep over your problems that will still be there tomorrow until you solve them, or you sleep without worry and face the same problem with enough strength from the night's sleep."

Two months later, he's recovering from these bad turns and paying off bad debts, having to sacrifice some luxuries just to get past them, but life has since become kinder.

"It's true. Worrying doesn't do any good," he said.

Don't think I'm little miss sunshine. Nope. My friends will roll on the floor laughing when you believe that. I'm Miss Sungit, I'm Miss Grouch, I'm Miss Taray, and I'm Miss Impatient. But no grudge.

One moment I'm raving mad. Next, I'm sitting quietly, smiling. Schizo!

But I don't care. The person who drove me to sungitness, grouchiness, tarayness, and impatience deserves the bawling out. No regrets. I wish that person good health and may he remember how he looks like as an ass. That is if he learns at all. Suffice it to say, not one of these reside in my memory. Erase. Not worth half a cell of my million brain cells.

But really, life can be so much easier if we don't tweak and scratch the scabs to make bigger scars. Just let the wounds be so they'll just heal and leave a smaller mark that can easily be erased by a spot remover care of good friend Golda of Bloom Facial Spa (free plugging pa yan ha!).

I just wish I had the same control when dealing with my nasty pimples that break out whenever Miming, my cat, decides to make my cheeks it's pillow. Fat cheeks.

"Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don't resist them; that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like," goes a quote from Lao Tzu.

By the way, I'm learning the Dragon Gate. saestremera@yahoo.com

Published in the Sun.Star Davao newspaper on December 29, 2013.

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