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Wednesday, March 17, 2004
Flavier: The parable of the dead pig
By Sen. Juan Flavier
THE farmers hated the governor with a passion. Apart from corruption, the politician showed absolutely no concern for his constituents. On top of this, he flaunted his ill-gotten wealth by driving around in his huge, imported van.
The governor had a short stature which amplified his obesity. Weighing all of 250 pounds, he sported a triple chin and a belly that wobbled with each weighty stride. His completely bald head glistened in the sun and on his black lips was an ever-present expensive cigar.
One day, he decided to motor to one of the barrios where he owned half of the farmlands. The air-conditioned van was the lead vehicle followed by three owner jeepneys filled with arrogant armed bodyguards.
Without warning, the van bumped a roaming pig. The fully-grown animal died instantly.
Unsure whether or not the owner was one of his tenants, the governor sent a bodyguard to inquire. He was to determine who the owner of the pig was and what had to be done - to offer fair compensation if necessary.
The bodyguard went to the first nipa hut just a hundred meters off the dirt road. After a few minutes, he returned heavy laden with baskets of fruits and vegetables.
"What happened?" asked the governor with evident surprise. He straightened himself from a slouched position in his plush seat.
"Are these gifts for me? We are supposed to be the ones paying for the pig. What is this all about?"
"I am not sure, Mr. Governor," explained the bodyguard. "I only said the pig is dead and the farmer gave me these farm produce."
"Go back to that farmer at once! There must be some misunderstanding," barked the governor.
The simple explanation of the farmer was: "When you said the pig is dead, I thought you meant the governor."
(March 17, 2004 issue)
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