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Tuesday, July 25, 2006
Malilong: ‘The Englishman’s Wife’
By Frank Malilong Jr.
The Other Side
You might find this interesting, my eldest daughter said in the note that accompanied an article that she forwarded. “The Englishman’s Wife” was written by Ronald Rodriguez, a Filipino connected with the School of Oriental and African Studies of the University of London. Here, he describes his meeting with an Englishman, who mistook him for Japanese, and his Filipina wife who said she is ashamed of her roots.
I did find the article interesting and today, the day immediately following the State of the Nation Address, I consider it timely to share its strong and relevant message with the readers. Here are some excerpts:
“Yesterday, I found myself staring out to sea at the pier in Brighton where I met and Englishman who thought I was Japanese. He was taken aback when I told him that I’m not from Japan, but from the Philippines. As he apologized for the mistake, I reassured him that I took no offense at all.
“He asked me how come I didn’t take any offense and I said: why should I? I am not going to make an issue out of a random instance of mistaken identity. Identity, I said, is important to know one’s self before it becomes useful for others to know you.
“He then told me that he has met a number of men and women from the Philippines living in the UK. Some of them, he said, could not even look him in the eye when they say they are Filipinos. He added that although it is saddening, he finds it understandable.
“But why is it understandable? I asked. After listening to his embarrassing stories about Presidents Marcos, Estrada and Arroyo, I realized he does not walk around unarmed. He is one of the few British people who know a lot about the Philippines.
“I countered that it is one thing to be ashamed of the country’s leaders; another thing to be ashamed of one’s own country. Those who are shamed of their being Filipinos because of the wrongdoings of our leaders are worse than the very people they are ashamed of. One can argue that our government is a reflection of our people. True, but not always. Sometimes it is a reflection of a people deceived or whose expectations have been failed.
“When I asked him how come he knew so much about the Philippines, he waved his hand towards a woman who responded by walking towards us. As she drew nearer, I asked the Englishman if we were looking at a Filipina. Yes, he replied. My wife is a Filipina. A question then raced through my mind: is she one of those who are ashamed of her country and race?
“My worst fears were confirmed. After a long conversation, I asked her if there was anything in the Philippines that was worth to her. Without batting an eyelash, she said “nothing”. I wished she had asked me the same question and I would have told her “everything”. I could only wonder how many Filipinos are like her.
“Shortly before I left, the Englishman shook my hand and whispered: ‘as long as you Filipinos believe in yourselves, there is no reason why we non-Filipinos should not believe in you.’ You are right, he said. “Identity is important to know one’s self before it becomes useful for others to know you.’”
(fmmalilong@yahoo.com)
For Bisaya stories from Cebu. Click here. (July 25, 2006 issue)
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