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Saturday, July 29, 2006
Pages: Funny? And true? The ‘Quotable Quotes’
By John Pages
Matchpoint
A few months back, I wrote in this space my favorite sports quotations. Here’s the second batch.
“When Tiger was six months old, he would sit in our garage, watching me hit balls into a net. He had been assimilating his golf swing. When he got out of the high chair, he had a golf swing.” - Earl Woods
“A goalkeeper is a goalkeeper because he can’t play football.” – Dutch manager Ruud Gullit.
“Winning is everything. The only ones who remember you when you come second are your wife and your dog.” – former race driver Damon Hill.
“His nerves. His memory. And I can’t remember the third thing.” – golfer Lee Trevino, listing the three things a golfer loses as he grows older.
“At home I am a nice guy; but I don’t want the world to know. Humble people, I’ve found, don’t get very far.” – Muhammad Ali.
“They should send Borg away to another planet. We play tennis. He plays something else.” – tennis star Illie Nastase.
“If you screw things up in tennis, it’s 15-love. If you screw up in boxing, it’s your ass.” – heavyweight boxer Randall ‘Tex’ Cobb.
“If it’s undisputed, what’s all the fighting about?” – comedian George Carlin.
“A caddie is someone who accompanies a golfer and didn’t see the ball either.” – Anonymous.
“Tennis doesn’t encourage any kind of intellectual development. The dumber you are on court, the better you’re going to play.” – former pro Jim Courier.
“Chess is ruthless: you’ve got to be prepared to kill people.” – British chess player Nigel Short.
“I believe every human has a finite number of heartbeats. I don’t intend to waste any of mine running around doing exercises.” – Astronaut Neil Armstrong.
“Old golfers never die – they simply lose their drive.” - Anonymous.
“Depends on how far my refrigerator is.”–George Foreman’s response when asked how far he liked to run when training.
“Sports do not build character. They reveal it.” - Heywood Broun.
“Golf is like an 18-year-old girl with the big boobs. You know it’s wrong but you can’t keep away from her.” - Val Doonican, Irish singer.
“All sports are games of inches.” – bowler Dick Riger.
“Work is the thing that interferes with golf.” - Frank Dane, US comedian.
“The true definition of a golfer is one who shouts ‘Fore’ takes five and puts down a three.” – Anonymous.
“It’s gonna be a thrilla, a chilla and a killa. When I get the gorilla in Manila.” – Muhammad Ali, 1975, looking forward to the ‘Thrilla in Manila’ against Joe Frazier.
“Jogging is very beneficial. It’s good for your legs and your feet. It’s also very good for the ground. It makes it feel needed.” -- Charles Schulz, US cartoonist.
“There isn’t a flaw in his golf or his makeup. He will win more Majors than Arnold Palmer and me combined. Somebody is going to dust my records. It might as well be Tiger, because he’s such a great kid. - Jack Nicklaus, speaking of Tiger Woods.
“Don King doesn’t care about black or white. He just cares about green.” – heavyweight boxer Larry Holmes, referring to the green color of the US dollar bill.
“It’s funny, but the more I practice, the luckier I become.” - Gary Player.
“Real pressure in golf is playing for $10 when you’ve only got $5 in your pocket.” – Lee Trevino.
“I always turn to the sports section first. The sports page records people’s accomplishments; the front page has nothing but man’s failures.” – former US Chief Justice Earl Warren.
“People want to try to find a new Pele. They couldn’t do that. You don’t find another Beethoven, you have only one Michelangelo. In music you have only one Frank Sinatra and in football you have only one Pele.” – Pele, 1998.
(john@brightacademy.edu.ph)
For Bisaya stories from Cebu. Click here. (July 29, 2006 issue)
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