Sunday, October 07, 2007 Luab: Grin and bear it By Evelyn R. Luab Light Sunday
WHEN women get together, the topic of conversation usually veers towards the headaches our house helpers give us.
Blessed are those whose house helpers have been with them for such a long time that the house machinery rolls smoothly. For the majority of us who are not so lucky, and the helper gets younger every year, we also get older before our time.
There is usually the “eager to please” young lady who will nod her head even before you finish your sentence, rush out of the room to get something which you really don’t need because she didn’t wait for the sentence to end.
The intended instruction was: “Perla, please get the glass in my room (helper rushes to the room), which I placed under my bed.” The helper goes into the room, sees the glass near the telephone and rushes back. The glass under the bed remains under the bed. If this incident has been repeated often enough, you are forgiven if you occasionally explode.
Here is another typical incident. “Ana, this empty grape juice bottle can be used several times over. Keep the rest of these empty bottles for I will use them later.” A big nod indicates that the instruction was understood. A month later, you ask for the bottles. Not a single bottle can be found. You ask the helper for the bottles. The answer you get is: “Gihipos man to nako diha.
Unya gikuha man nila.” (I kept them but they took it.) When asked who took them, the answer can be very irritating because it goes this way: “Ambot, diha ra man to.” (I don’t know. They were just there.) as she points to a place which is accessible to all.
Another case would be when you ask for an antacid from the one in charge of keeping your medicine. She immediately replies: “Wa na man, ma’am.”
(We’ve run out of antacids.) Somehow your sixth sense tells you that you still have some antacids. You send someone else to look for the supposedly nonexistent relief pills in the medicine cabinet and presto, the errant pills appear. So what do you do? If you want to live longer, just grin and bear it.
The most common excuse that you receive when looking for a favorite drinking glass or cup is: “Ambot, ma’am, pag-abot nako waa na may blue nga baso o green nga tasa.” (I don’t know ma’am because when I first came, there was no blue glass or green cup.) Praise God, for the other helpful companions in the house who will come across with the truth. “Nabuak man to niya, ma’am. Wa lang na siya magsaba.” (She broke it ma’am. She just did not let you know!) Do you blow a blood vessel? No! You go out and buy another favorite kind of glass or cup.
A hired helper is difficult to find nowadays. Even agencies that supply house helpers cannot guarantee that you get people who will really serve you well.
To quote a good friend: “If people abroad can do things by themselves, why can’t we?” Well, if you can, why not? Actually, we have been pampered so much by what we have been accustomed to. For others who really need help for one reason or another then the virtue of patience and understanding should come in handy.
What about petty thieves? In a group of honest people there usually exists one or two who cannot help, but pick up money left lying around or whatever pleases their eye. If the helper can still be taught values, keep temptation out of the way and do your best to help her reform. However, if nothing works then one just has to let go. You cannot spend the rest of your life locking doors, cabinets, or cupboards.
We are all supposed to help each other and we can. At least we know we are all in this predicament together.
