Monday, December 24, 2007 Postcards from the edge By Mayette Q. Tabada
CHRISTMAS makes any distance seem endless.
Especially for those used to the noisy intimacy of the drawn-out Filipino Christmas, separation during the holidays wrings the soul of Filipino pilgrims, ironically dislocated to go on a journey to seek what’s best for loved ones back home.
So it seemed for Joe Patingo, who left the country in 1992 for a job with an Information Technology consulting company in the United States. From the snug embrace of a close clan, Joe felt he was snatched away and dropped in the midst of total strangers.
“The first few years were difficult,” he remembers of those first few Christmases in a place where the only people he knew were co-workers.
In time, though, Joe gained friends and spent the holidays with them and their families. He also visited relatives scattered in the other states, as well as in Canada.
Violeta Gandiongco-Walker admits she, too, followed the siren song of greener pastures to the US. But the self-admitted golden girl says she “faced the unknown” with her innate vivaciousness, nurtured in the land of her birth.
“I don’t create idle time,” asserts the indefatigable Violy who plunges into all kinds of involvement, from the social and religious to the “really physical.”
Like Joe, who discovered that the phone was his “best friend” in keeping in touch with home, Violy tapped Classic and New Technology—long-distance calls and emails—to get “uplifting news” about the loved ones she left behind.
“Sometimes, your family will not tell you the real score (at home) but friends will.”
But aside from relying on the human connection, Violy staunchly believes in divine connectivity. “The greatest factor (in coping with separation) is trust in God.”
Being away from loved ones renders one vulnerable to worries, she admits. But knowing Someone is looking out for them in ways humans cannot equal, let alone surpass, should set one’s fears to rest.
“Trust God,” emails Violy, who testifies that it’s not only the Unseen looking out for her but also the prayers of friends. “(Praying) really works.”
Cathy Perez left her Sun.Star Cebu Live! family when she relocated this year to Tianjin, China, where she is an English instructor at the Tianjin University of Finance and Economics.
As her first Christmas away from home draws nearer, Cathy is caught up preparing for the final examination of her students. With the resilience that is boon companion to the young and open-minded, Cathy has formed new families in the vastness of a culture she has yet to explore.
“It started to snow here this morning, it’s so nice… Christmas jud kaayo, like what I used to see in Hollywood movies,” she enthuses.
Her cheery, frequent notes and photos transmitted via Yahoo Messenger attest that she has found a new home, even if the yuletide decors and songs are indeed scanty in China, as the predominantly Buddhist population doesn’t observe Christmas.
Whether joking among her students and English teaching colleagues (she is the only Asian), hanging out with Chinese and Korean pals, or sharing Sunday brunch and swapping stories in Cebuano or Filipino with kababayans, Cathy looks on this separation as a “Christmas gift in itself.”
Though she yearns for family and her girlfriends in Cebu, misa de gallo (dawn masses) and the Christmas carols of children gathered at her family’s doorstep, Cathy realizes that the “spirit of Christmas is universal.”
“Through all the missing, I just know that where I am is where I should be,” she emails via her favorite Yahoo. “Christmas is basically a celebration of the heart, far beyond the decors and glitter of parties.”
