Sunday, March 16, 2008 Luab: Under the weight of the Cross By Evelyn R. Luab light sunday
TOMORROW will be the start of Holy Week.
A good number of us will join a retreat group to spend time in silence. In my case, I’m joining the Redemptorist retreat group for women only. We start tomorrow at 5 p.m. at the Holy Family Retreat House, and the retreat will end on Wednesday, at 8 a.m. We will be guided by Father Noel Gartlan. If anyone would like to join us, the welcome mat is being spread out and inviting.
We senior citizens know what the cross means. We’ve carried different sizes of crosses in our younger years. The cross is always there. It just changes size and shape as we go along.
We had marital crosses, sibling crosses, financial crosses, ailment crosses, job crosses, etc. Many times we are helped along the way by relatives, friends and even gracious strangers. Over and above the friendly, sturdy pillars of strength we have had God’s presence all the way.
When the children were growing up, I thought a two-week bout with pneumonia, H. fever, appendicitis, and an ovarian cyst in a “grader” were already huge crosses.
However, when our family grew mature, other kinds of crosses appeared. Job problems, school problems, suitor problems, curfew problems, etc. A lot of crosses came along.
When the children started their own families or when they migrated to other places, other crosses appeared.
For us senior citizens, we face loneliness, ailments, insecurities, etc. however these are nothing compared to the cross Jesus carried all the way to Golgotha amidst flagellation, jeers, sweat and blood. We carry our crosses for different reasons. We sacrifice for the children, for our husbands, for our parents and even for close relatives. Sometimes our motives were questionable. In the case of our Savior, he carried His cross out of love for us. No other reason.
Maybe the reason why many of us still feel that Christ’s cross, His carrying it for us, His final death has really very little to do with our lives is because we have never stopped to reflect on what our crosses have meant for us. What has the cross done to make us better?
Maybe its time to ask ourselves, “How much has the weight of our cross made us more compassionate towards our neighbor?
I have a friend who at times is lucid and at times is not. I do not know how she arrived at the state she is in. We became friends because at one time she knelt beside me in church and started talking to herself. I remembered what my late mother told me. She said, “Sometimes when hunger has paid us a long visit we have a tendency to lose our mind.” Thinking that I might be able to help, I slipped my seatmate a little money and whispered. “Naa koy sobra. Pamahaw usa didto! (I have a little money, go and have breakfast on me.)” My seatmate flashed me a smile, took the money and left.
The next time I met her, still in church, she was angrily talking to herself. So I brought out a twenty peso bill. This time however, she slapped it away and said, “Pahawa! Samok!” (Get out of my sight! You just bother me!)
Ours is a friendship that blows hot and cold. On certain days she sits next to me and asks for breakfast. On other days, she looks through me. The cross she is carrying must be pretty heavy. The parishioners who attend the same church I do are kind to her. There are days when she responds to a few of us. There must be people nearly falling under the weight of their crosses. A helping hand from anyone of us could spell their being able to stand up again. Now is the time to love our neighbor more.
