Sunday, May 25, 2008 Luab: Bumps and craters By Evelyn R. Luab light sunday
ANYBODY who regularly takes the bus knows that we never get used to a driver’s unexpected swerves.
We clutch whatever we can hold on to keep us from falling off our seats.
The bus of life throws us into unexpected curves, too. Just when we think everything is going well with us, our comfort zone is rocked.
We get earthquakes, volcanic eruptions, typhoons, landslides and flashfloods. Illness in the family, job dislocations, bankruptcy, and separation from spouses are just a few of the bigger jolts.
The smaller curves are unexpected quarrels resulting into cold shoulders; or a loss of our purse with all of our credit cards and our license to drive; or loss of someone whom we thought would never stand us up but did.
All of us have fallen off our seats at one time or another. How did we get back to sit upright again?
In my case, I always clutch God’s hand and never let go.
When the children were small, my husband lost his job. His company folded up and left the country. I went through a ruptured appendix with my eldest, two weeks of severe whooping cough with the next child, an ovarian cyst surgery with my sixth-grader then, H-fever with my second to the youngest and a cut tongue with the youngest. All these I survived while praying, sometimes starting with the “Our Father” and in my anxiety ending with the “Hail Mary.”
The cancer bouts my mom and I had filled the heavens with a bombardment of prayers from family and friends. My mom eventually succumbed after eleven months while I survived.
The biggest curve I’ve received was the death of my partner in life. Togetherness for 43 years is not so easy to replace. There are even days when a memory or a place revisited or a tune trigger fresh tears. However, saying “Lord, I place my trust in you” always makes things better.
We will never get rid of the brickbats or brick-a-bracs life throws at us. Coping by praying and trusting in God is a big, big help but it isn’t enough. We have to help ourselves, too.
Rod died on Nov. 3, 2006. On Nov. 18, 2006, I respected a commitment I made with the young UPscans at Delaney Hall in Diliman. I spent the whole afternoon in a seminar of sorts with them.
The whole of 2007, I honored a once-a-month speaking engagement to handicapped employees at Goodwill Industries in their plant site. That stint helped me more than the employees I spoke to. The year 2008 is nearly half-way through but I’ve been busy doing projects which alleviate the plight of our very poor and working in depressed areas.
Responding to the needs of others often removes the thoughts that tend to negatively settle on us. I’ve never known this formula to fail. Get out of the house. Visit a friend in need or perhaps a lonely relative who just needs to talk and presto! You realize that your own woes were not so big after all. (Of course, I’m talking of ordinary, small upheavals which we make into mountains.)
Visiting our married children who live in the same city we do, also removes the doldrums. Being with grandchildren even for 10 minutes already is distracting. A toothy smile, an impish grin or a mischievous tickle will drive away the clouds of gloom.
As long as we still are on earth, the bus of life will drive us over bumps and craters strong enough to dislodge us if we allow ourselves to be unseated.
Trusting in God, prayers, self-help and helping others can be the pillars we can hold on to. As long as we open ourselves to those around us, to people who care, we can continue our travel through life with ease.
