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Wednesday, January 05, 2005
Lizada: Hair spa
By Rene Lizada
Papa's Table
"To give pleasure to a single heart by a single act is better than a thousand heads bowing in prayer." - Gandhi
LAST December 28 my wife and I celebrated our 19th wedding anniversary. And since it was a special day. I promised my wife that I would do whatever she wanted. It was my mistake for the day. For on that day, among all days, Chona wanted to go to the beauty salon to have a hair spa. And she wanted me to have one also. Now that was a problem. For one thing, when I go to a beauty salon, I only go there for a haircut, nothing else, nothing more. But this time, I had no choice because it was our wedding anniversary and I was bound by my oath to do whatever she wanted.
The first beauty salon we entered looked like a marketplace and not a haven for beauty. There were so many women of different sizes and ages with the same expression on their faces. One middle-aged woman was having her toenails done. Another was having her hair blown to kingdom come. A younger lady was having a manicure. Two blowers were blowing like mad and in the din, you could hear the endless banter of the hair stylists. To top it all, there was a radio blaring "ang laki laki..." And this was where I was going to get a hair spa? I looked at the price for the service. Four hundred pesos for a hair spa? That was one CD already. I told Chona that this was not my idea of a salon. I backed out.
As we were leaving my wife had this look of disappointment on her face. She looked at me and said, "I was really looking forward to this hair spa." If you are married and you hear words like, " I was really looking forward..." then you better do something fast because if you do not, the only thing you will look forward to is your behind. And to make matters worse, this was our anniversary. So I really had no choice and I told my wife that we were going to have a hair spa but not in that market. Luckily for her, there was another salon just a door away. We entered and to my surprise, it was quiet. Only a few people were in it. But that made me think also. If there are only a few people here then the service here must not be that good. If I had my hair spa here my hair might end up looking like a spatula. But as I said, I had no choice.
Before we go on, it would be comforting for you to know that never in my whole life have I had a hair spa. Not even a hot oil treatment touched my virgin hair.
So I sat down and this person came and started fluffing my hair. My wife who was beside me, gave me an amused look. So this guy started to rumple my hair with so much enthusiasm that I was afraid that all my hair would fall off. Mercifully, he stopped then he looked at my hair and I determined what to do with it. But if you have never had a hair spa in your life here is a tip, hair spa is nothing but hot and cold. Let me explain.
The first thing that happens is a shampoo. You lie down and someone splashes your hair with warm water. Then the shampoo, then the conditioner. Both feel cold. Then the warm water again. The shampoo girl asks you to stand and wraps a towel around your head and water trickles down your neck. Again, it becomes cold.
You get to your seat and the guy looks at your hair with so much determination that it scares you. Then the treatment begins. He gets this gel and starts to massage it to your head. He lathers it all over. Top to bottom until your entire scalp screams because it is drowning from all the gel.
Your hair is so hard that you could do sculptures with it. You know, like those punk rockers in the Eighties. The one thing that you notice about the gel after the initial shock is that it is, you guessed it, cold. Cold as ice. My head was so cold that ice crystals were forming and that Rudolph was prancing about. I looked at my wife and I almost did not recognize her as she was becoming a snowwoman. But she looked happy, that was enough. Me? I never thought that I would freeze because my hair was cold. And to make matters worse, the Yeti wrapped my hair with a plastic covering.
Now all the coldness was trapped around my head which was getting worse every minute. After the Ice Age of my hair was done, came something else. The Yeti brought in something which I never thought I would experience. You see those contraptions that they have in salons? Those that are placed over the heads of old women? Yes, with all their rollers on? Well, it finally happened to me. If I am not mistaken, they called it a steamer. Pardon my ignorance because I could not hear what they were saying because my ears were getting frozen also. So the snowman brought the steamer over my head and turned it on. With pleading eyes I looked at myself at the mirror. Ahhhh, the things I do for my wife. Slowly but surely, the cold turned to hot. There was actually steam over my head and the cold was being replaced by the heat emanating from the damn steamer. So this is how a siopao feels. After a few centuries, the ice melted and now my head had turned into a desert. Mercifully, the nomad took the steamer away. He took away the covering and looked at my confused hair. The he started massaging it a little as if to breathe life into it. Then he said,
"Sir, mag-rinse ka na".
And you guessed it right, it was cold water that was used. After the rinsing I was led back to my seat. A junior nomad approached me and said, "Sir blower tayo."
Oh my!, will this never end!! Now it was back to hot again. He applied some gel and then blew my hair away. Finally he was done, I was done. I looked at my hair. There seemed to be no change at all. It looked the same but at least I knew that my hair was versatile after all, it could handle both hot and cold.
I stood. Chona was not done yet so I started to read some magazine. My wife looked so happy with her spa. I admit that after she was done, her hair looked a lot better. It had more bounce and body. She looked prettier actually. She even looked even more ravishing when she said, "ako na ang magbayad nito." Hmmm. I wanted to hug her but I was afraid my dynamic hair would notice.
My next project would be a facial. Anyone can tell me where I can get a great facial? Oh, by the way, Happy New Year!
(January 5, 2005 issue)
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