Friday, September 15, 2006
Are you happy?
By Henrylito D. Tacio
Regarding Herny
LAST summer, when I was in the United States, I learned something about happiness from my nephew. It was already ten in the morning and I had just taken my breakfast when I saw Phillip feeling sad while watching television.
"What happened?" I inquired. "My brother is again playing computer games downstairs," he told me. "Why don't we go out," I suggested. "We can go to your school playground and go bicycling." Upon hearing this, his eyes twinkled. "Why not?" he approved.
That day, I had a good time with my nephew. I was sure that Phillip had a grand time, too. "Are you happy now?" I asked him. "Sure, I do," he replied. In fact, when we returned home, he told his brother Erik what we had done that day. "Why didn't you tell me?" Erik said. "I could have gone with you."
Much happiness is overlooked simply because it doesn't cost anything. Examples include like going out in the farm, fishing together, camping, or just even by walking with someone. Ham Ginott stated: "Happiness is not an end in itself. It is a by-product of working, playing, loving, and living."
It goes without saying that if you have everything in life, you are happy. That's completely a wrong notion. Money, after all, cannot buy happiness. Storm Jameson reminds: "Happiness? It is an illusion to think that more comfort means more happiness. Happiness comes of the capacity to feel deeply, to enjoy simply, to think freely, to risk life, to be needed."
If you encounter people who don't smile or laugh, don’t think that they're not happy. Unknown to you, they may be elated. "If you stop to count the people who are fundamentally and consistently happy, I suspect you will recognize that they have two characteristics in common: They work hard at tasks that have meaning for them, and they are essentially kind in their dealings with other people."
Looking for a recipe for happiness? Here's one: Take equal parts of faith and courage, mix well with a sense of humor, sprinkle with a few tears, and add a helping of kindness for others. Bake in a good-natured oven and dust with laughter. Scrape away any self-indulgence that is apparent and serve with generous helpings.
H.C. Mattern has a suggestion: "The way to happiness: keep your heart free from hate, your mind from worry. Live simply, expect little, give much. Fill your life with love. Scatter sunshine. Forget self, think of others. Do as you would be done by. Try this for a week and you will be surprised."
In other countries, there are people who conduct studies on happiness. In fact, the British think-tank New Economics Foundation has ranked the Philippines 17th on its list of happiest people on earth. The index combines life satisfaction, life expectancy and environmental footprint the amount of land required to sustain the population and absorb its energy consumption.
Some Asian countries which made it to the list include Indonesia (23rd in the ranking), Thailand (32nd), Malaysia (44th), and Hong Kong (88th).
In the United States, there are people who have conducted studies on happiness. One of them is Dr David Myers, a psychologist. In an article which appeared in Reader's Digest, he offered nine steps to happiness. I have copied them in toto:
1. Savor the moment. Live in the present: treasure the smile of your child in the morning, the satisfaction of helping a friend, the pleasure of curling up with a good book.
2. Take control of your time. Happy people set big goals, then break them into daily bits. Writing a 300-page book is a formidable task; spinning out two pages daily is easy enough. Repeat this process 150 times and you have a book. This principle can be applied to any task.
3. Accentuate the positive. There is plenty of evidence to suggest that negative emotions lash back at us, while positive ones can boost the body's healing process. Happy people take steps to keep their negative emotions in check.
4. Give priority to close relationships. People with close friends, spouses, partners cope better with stresses such as bereavement, job loss, illness, even rape. A study has shown that people who could name five close friends were 60 percent more likely to be “very happy than those who couldn't name any.
5. Act happy. Experiments show that people who put on a happy face really do feel better. It seems that the facial muscles used to smile widely actually trigger happy feelings in the brain.
6. Don't vegetate. Don't engage in self-absorbed idleness or park yourself in front of the television. Get involved in something that utilizes your skills.
7. Get moving. Aerobic exercise is an antidote to depression and anxiety. In a study of moderately depressed students at the University of Kansas, those in an aerobics program improved dramatically. Those in a relaxation group felt only slightly better.
8. Get rest. Happy people exude vigor, but they also reserve time for sleep and solitude.
9. Take care of the soul. Research on faith and wellbeing shows that people who are actively religious. It has been found that religious people are much less likely to abuse drugs and alcohol, to divorce or commit suicide. As one song goes, Happiness is to know the Savior.
For comments, write me at tasyo2002@yahoo.com
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