Monday, February 12, 2007
Maxey: It's a funny world
By Ram Maxey
Bar None
THE following news captions the other day made my day:
"City beaches now safe for bathing"
Who wants to take a bath on a beach? Go swimming in beach waters, yes. Sunbathing on a beach is okay too. But have you ever seen anyone taking a bath by pouring beach sand all over his/her body?
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"Mayor signs ban on aerial spray"
All arguments for and against aerial spraying from here on are moot and academic and an exercise in futility. Unless the City Council recalls the ordinance for a compelling reason.
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"No more dialogues inside rebel camps"
The last one involving a group that included a Cabinet undersecretary and a Marine major-general was held under duress. It was not a dialogue but a monologue by MNLF commander Ustadz Habier Malik.
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"Security tightened in Kidapawan"
With 49 jailbreakers on the loose, not even Gov. Manny Piñol could feel safe and couldn't care less if all 49 dropped dead. In fact one of the escapees did just that, drop dead. One Indong Taligapen, charged with murder and frustrated murder, was gunned down by a military posse early Saturday afternoon while two other escapees, also facing murder and frustrated murder charges, were rounded up leaving 46 for Piñol to continue having sleepless nights.
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"Art of kissing: Over 50 variations"
Caution: By the time you get to No. 29 your lips shall have stiffened with cramps. Resume after 15 minutes rest. Have a nice St. Valentine's Day.
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"Pacquiao joins LP's Atienza wing"
What his Mexicans foes could not do to him, Pinoy politics will. Wanna bet?
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"Police keep eyes on motels, inns this Valentine's Day"
Killjoys.
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"Puno warns, Metro Manila jails getting overcrowded"
That was the problem in Kidapawan, too. But one rifle-grenade blast solved it. Just like that.
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"Sec. Yap intervenes in aerial spray ban"
Too late the hero.
For more Philippine news, visit Sun.Star Pampanga. For Bisaya stories from Davao. Click here. (February 12, 2007 issue)
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