THE hardest feeling you can have in your life is missing someone you love, it’s like you’re missing some part of you. You can’t find ways how to ease the pain because there’s no way of communicating with them because they are no longer with us.
You know what, that’s the feeling I get whenever I remember my lola.
As a kid, I spent my weekends with her and as I grew up I used to go everywhere with her.
Memories of my lola, of how happy, how loving and how she cares for everyone occur to me every day. Everywhere I go I see memories of her.
We lost her a few months ago. Her illness stole her from us. But even as she neared the end of her life, she still managed to make us smile and she showed how strong she is.
One day when she already knew about her illness, I went to her room to check if she’s okay. She was folding shirts on her bed, so I helped her, then she talked to me and told me, “Cathy dilinakokitasaimomo graduate, sayangdilinakomagdugay (I will no longer witness your graduation. I don’t have long to live).” Hearing this from her made me burst into tears. I felt so much pain. She’s already accepting the fact that she’s going to lose us, but I know deep inside she wanted to stay.
Although it was painful, those words were the sweetest I have heard. Missing her and reminiscing our happy days together may not bring her back, but those will serve as her best gifts for me, her smiles and the lessons in life she taught me. No one can steal those from me and no one can replace the memories my lola had left for me and my family.
Wherever she is right now, I know she’s happy because we remember her with fondness and we love her even though she’s no longer with us.
Sometimes memories are good because it reminds us of how people loved us and sometimes they are not beacuse it only brought sadness, but it’s up to you if you want to bring the happy or the sad memories. (Cathyrine N. Macrojon)
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