WITH my newsfeed abuzz regarding the Commission on Human Rights (CHR) receiving only 1,000 pesos as their budget for the whole of year 2018 thanks to 119 crocodiles, er congressmen, it is rather hard to remain silent about the issue and pretend it doesn’t exist. There’s a circus, with a bunch of clowns in the House (of Representatives), but who’s laughing? Human rights in a non-partisan issue that concerns us all.
This morning, my children asked me for additional allowance for school activities, so I could not help but be reminded yet again when I saw the crisp 1,000 peso bill sitting in my wallet. At times, I feel like my own children rob me (with consent: an oxymoron). And right now, that’s exactly what I feel about this decision, and most definitely without my consent.
One thousand measly bucks to champion human rights…hmmm, that’s akin to highway robbery. Face palm! Seeing that 1,000 bill is comparable to a movie marquee with its flashing lights screaming, “Look at me, look at me, and realize my true worth!”
Depending on how much you earn, and how many mouths you feed, the value of one thousand pesos is relative. To a minimum wage earner, that much for a day is big; but for a person who is used to a more privileged lifestyle, it is puny. Living life on a shoestring budget is definitely difficult, with the string becoming even shorter with more mouths to feed.
Now, imagine stretching that 1,000 pesos to make it last for one year, and on top of that, divide it up between millions of Filipinos. The end result of this equation is chopped liver. And they might as well chop all our livers because, hey, human rights issues clearly are no longer a big deal. Barya. Loose change. For human rights. I kennat! Don’t me!
No matter the monthly income, all of us would definitely agree that every centavo counts because we work bloody hard for our money. Oh, wait, let’s not count those lucky bastards whose salary, drivers, bodyguards, etc, are funded by our taxes (cough, cough: batu-bato sa langit ang tamaan may bukol). So really, how much can a thousand bucks buy these days?
Half a sack of rice -That may seem a lot, but for those families who have lot of members and whose stomachs are like bottomless pits, that ain’t gonna last very long. But being a staple in our diets, we all gotta have these in our pantries. We cannot be h(A)ngry! A person whose stomach is aching can’t think clearly. So hurry and deliver sacks of rice to The House pronto and feed the clowns!
Around 25 Liters of gas -If you ever want to go anywhere, then you definitely need gas for your car. If you don’t have a car, it’s Cadillac-ad (lakad, yo). How much gas do you need to get those congressmen to listen to you? Oh heavens no! I am not telling you to set The House on fire, tempting as it may be. But you can still march all the way to Batasan and tell those cursed 119 that they don’t represent you. Do it, while there’s still freedom of speech.
Passport – The Philippine Passport is around 950 pesos. Swak sa budget! But don’t make a mistake of going on a weekend because they add another 250 pesos for expedited processing. A passport is essential for 1) identification, 2) a quick vacation, 3) working abroad, and lastly, 3) a quick literal get-away should you ever need to run from someone in power (hey, the CHR is rendered useless with this budget, after all!).
Internet connection –There are plans you can avail of with this budget. And really, we all need it. Now more than ever, it is essential to read up on current affairs and update our knowledge banks (hello, brain). These days, there really is no excuse for being ignorant. Secure that internet connection because as early as now, you need to Google your Representative’s background (fact-check) in time for the next election.
Educational books – One algebra book of my child is 700 pesos. Pasok ulit sa budget! But wait, that’s just one book. Argh! This is an ardent reminder that everyone should never overlook the importance of education. A critical, discerning mind is essential in making informed choices, and that includes who is put in power.
Electricity – Electric fan at this rate! Don’t expect to be able to turn on your airconditioning units for a thousand bucks. Climate controlled environments are just too expensive. Tiis-ganda (suffer in silence), mga bes. And really, with the amount of times we have been screwed by the mahangin people in power, we ought to be used to this by now. Third world na lang ba lagi?
Phone – An iphone X is 1,000 but oops, in dollars. That’s out of the list, ambishosa! But definitely, there are still cheap dumb phones up for grabs because it is essential that “the subscriber can be reached”. Only the phone should be dumb and not you, ha! Sadly, our Representatives in The House are hard to reach…and they are supposed to represent us. Oh the irony!
Boxes of condoms – Depending on the brand (Durex, Trust) and the type (feather-weight, classic, sheepskin, extra-large ooh la la), you can purchase several boxes of condoms. Please, if you belong to the category of the 119 who think human rights is not a big deal, I strongly suggest for you to use these love gloves. Let’s not spread your seed for the benefit of humanity. Hay, buti pa ang condom may Trust!
There are other things that you can buy for a thousand pesos, but these ones are the top priority. Sad to say, human rights is not included in the list because we can't afford it. The message is clear: funding for this constitutionally-mandated independent institution that checks and balances abuses of power is not a priority. (Mind you that’s not their only mandate. Google is free.)
If our Representatives believe that the people running the Commission on Human Rights are incompetent, then replace them. Why kill the whole institution? After the fiasco with Uber and the LTFRB, along with the plates and cards of LTO, it is clear that incompetence happens in government agencies. Do we strip away their budget too? Giving the CHR one thousand ensures that they will not be able to perform their mandate to protect us at all. So bahala na lang si Batman!
To troll me, please check: www.orochronicles.com/blog/