Michelle (M): It’s new year and let’s talk about dating at its best. The best dates one can ever have are the ones that were the most fun with the best company. They may not end in love or marriage but they have lived on with us because we enjoyed them so much. There was something memorable about them. Lots of dates are dull, meaningless repetition of standard question and answer sessions. I haven’t been much of a dater, but know of friends who are serial daters who have been to some truly spectacular ones.

Darwin John (DJ): Dating looks spectacular when we see it in movies. Keep in mind though that in real life, there is no background music. Thus, it needs more work. Humor plays an important role. We generally want to go out with someone who makes us feel good. But don’t take it too far by saying lines like “Hey baby, you must be a broom cause you just swept me off my feet.” It’s not only comic timing that’s important. Logic, too!

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M: The best dates are the simplest, the least forced, the most natural. It can happen with a complete stranger or planned weeks in advance by making special plans to win your date’s heart. I remember a friend who chatted with a person on the Internet. After a year of communicating with each other, the guy flew over to meet my friend and they had the most unforgettable date.

They had tremendous fun. Both were fantastic company with hours of laughter and great food. They didn’t end up with each other but the point is that a perfect date can really be unplanned.

DJ: In my opinion, this sounds more like an exception than the rule. Planning can make the difference when it comes to dating success. But keep it casual so it will look unplanned. Choose a venue that you’re comfortable with. Study the menu, and let her know in advance. It’ll help her decide what to wear. And it’ll lessen the time waiting for her to dress up.

Open communication strengthens relationships but this is not usually the time to have serious discussions. A conversation about commitment, for example, that occurs too soon, or with a partner who is not yet on the same wavelength, can be disastrous. Don’t be too excited to talk about your wedding plans. Relax; have fun.

Do not fart right away but be yourself. Even if you have that incongruous giggle or a dance move that is so not from this decade, you are okay. It’s only when love is thin when faults are thick.

M: I think that when we plan something too far in advance we can get carried away and build things up to much higher levels than can be justified. Sometimes, if we know we are going on a date on Saturday, we will start planning, however, much we try not to. Before you know it, a simple date has turned into the planning of a wedding! In other words, simple spontaneous dates are the best.

Formality tends to wreck the best dates. The worry of getting everything right, even picking the right clothes can be stressful. The best dates involve somewhere far more relaxed. It could be long talks over coffee, a game of badminton, or a stroll on the beach. The best dates are ones that begin with few expectations and open into something much greater. Having great dates means being open minded, being open to new people, new ideas and very good conversation.

DJ: In dating, one can’t expect to be able to say the right words, do the right thing always at the right time. You’re not a character of a movie. Everything happens real time without the luxury of cuts. Keep in mind that greatness usually happens naturally. Have that sense of balance. So to all singles, let’s clink our glasses and wish ourselves a great new year ahead!

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