Liporada: A letter from my conscience about 2010 wannabes

BAGUIO CITY -- Dear wide-awake self, Sorry, I had to do this during a time when you usually have 'wet dreams'. I really need your full attention. Please don't be surprised I slipped in one of your Bardo stages - the one between sleep and the wakeful state.

Thing is, I can't just stand just being your honker, hangin' 'round to press that red button when you're lookin' with intent to commit adultery at some pretty lady during your alert state.

I am not that shallow, ya know. I can do politics, too.

You see, the Facebook information in your head suggesting 'Burnhamgate' was simply too much, I wasn't able to butt in your head.

Simply, you had bigotry written all over your gullible brain.

So while your state of awareness is far away from that 'Bowl of Kimchee at Bin Hum Park', I would like to remind you swapping all (as in all) your current city officials for newbies come May 2010 might not be a good idea, after all.

(Note to wide awake self: I used the word 'might' because I am prohibited from overruling the 'freewill' thing Adam passed on to you).

This won't take long... promise. Here are ten observations on 'em wannabes to put you in check, again, from backing the wrong horses 'coz of your predispositions:

First, there's a group of 'em supporting a political biggie who claims he got his millions from 'C-5 at taga'.

My take: 'birds of the same feather flock together'.

Second, at the point when Burnhamgate was noisiest, some of 'em visited the council session declaring they were the 'great dark hope'. Well, no matter what they do, they would still remain dark in and out.

Voting for 'em is like buying your own rope.

Third, the channels supplied by your local cable provider unbelievably mushroomed with 'em producers cum wannabes annoyingly squeezing their faces to fit your TV's frame whenever they could.

Please bear in mind that they're not merely seeking a part in the remake of the movie "Pacifica Falayfay and Her Magic Talong." They wouldn't even make the role of the vegetable because of their dreadful acting.

Besides, you're old enough to know what "roll of investment" means to be swayed by their gasconading.

Fourth, like the garbage you have at home, some of 'em newbies are merely recycled. Beware: you may just be placing 'em residuals in the wrong bin.

Fifth, please remember God doesn't take sides in Baguio politics. If a minister decides to run, better save your 'church contributions' for the next one.

Besides, your step-mom is a Muslim, your older sister is INK, your uncle is Mormon, and your wife is Roman Catholic. Do not be selfish.

Sixth, why do they plant trees only now? if they cared so much about 'greening' your city, where were they when you were planting pine trees in Busol or watering seedlings at the tree park near Kum Bin Jung Center?

Seventh, if they cared so much about polluting your fresh air, why do they still drive 'em SUV's when they can wake up early to have a leisurely walk or ride a PUV, which helps 'em poor boundary drivers?

Eighth, if they claim to be the best at what they do and what their chosen as vocations help many of your neighbors, then why change vocations, at all?

Oh and yes, don't forget to ring your uncles in Mindanao. They better do something about Manny Pacquiao running to save your favorite cable show - boxing.

Ninth, some of 'em have answers for the garbage problem... err... period. Nothing follows.

For all you know, they're just some realtors reeling from that national TV network report that Baguio is 90-percent landslide prone.

Tenth, some of them tell you they will listen but they never stop talking. They even go to the extent of saying they love your city while they protect a private assertion over your city's claims.

Well, that's about it.

P.S. Do not fret... I'll try to work out a replay of Ashley Greene with your dream provider so you could go back to your as sanctioned hallucination.

Sincerely,

Your Conscience

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