GETTING to know someone without appearing interrogative or pushy is a delicate dance. You want to make the person feel good by expressing your interest and yet you don’t want to appear desperate for information or worse, concocting a plan to stalk him or her.
There are hundreds of adult ways this can be done. But the kids may be on to something with their game of “Would you rather...”
I realized on a teeth-grinding after-five Friday traffic, just how insightful it can be. The questions are simple, sometimes silly, sometimes gross, and sometimes weird.
But answering them gives you glimpses of who you are, your preferences when pushed to the wall and choices on impossible scenarios. Because you can’t choose “or” or get out of the only 2 choices given, you start activating more of those neural parts of the brain responsible for creativity and imagination.
You get a glimpse of the child or person you’re with as they couldn’t help but explain their answers. Long hours of waiting become bonding time. These seemingly non-threatening only-what-ifs get you longer and more accurate information compared to your “How’s your day?” which is typically shrugged off with a hasty “ok” or “fine.”
There are many versions online and in card games or board games. For now, here are some examples from signupgenius.com you may want to play out with family and friends:
• Would you rather go into the past and meet your ancestors or go into the future and meet your great-great-grandchildren?
• Would you rather have more time or more money?
• Would you rather have a rewind button or a pause button on your life?
• Would you rather be able to talk to the animals or speak all foreign languages?
• Would you rather win the lottery or live twice as long?
• Would you feel worse if no one showed up at your wedding or at your funeral?
• Would you rather be without internet for a week, or without your phone?
• Would you rather lose your vision or your hearing?
• For your birthday, would you rather receive cash or gifts?
• Would you rather go to a movie or to dinner alone?
• Would you rather always say everything on your mind or never speak again?
• Would you rather make a phone call or send a text?
• Would you rather read an awesome book or watch a good movie?
• Would you rather be the most popular person at work or school or the smartest?
• Would you rather put a stop to war or end world hunger?
• Would you rather explore space or the ocean?
• Would you rather go deep sea diving or bungee jumping?
• Would you rather be a kid your whole life or an adult your whole life?
• Would you rather go on a cruise with friends or with your spouse?
• Would you rather lose your keys or your cell phone?
• Would you rather eat a meal of cow tongue or octopus?
• Would you rather have x-ray vision or magnified hearing?
• Would you rather work in a group or work alone?
• Would you rather be stuck on an island alone or with someone who talks incessantly?
• When you’re old, would you rather die before or after your spouse?
• Would you rather be the youngest or the oldest sibling?
• Would you rather get rich through hard work or through winning the lottery?
• Would you rather have a 10-hour dinner with a headstrong politician from an opposing party, or attend a 10-hour concert for a music group you detest?
• Would you rather be an Olympic gold medalist or a Nobel Peace Prize winner?
• Would you rather have Antman or Hulk on your side?
• Would you rather be proposed to in private or in front of family and friends?
• Would you rather hear the good news or the bad news first?
• Would you rather be a little late or way too early?
• Would you rather have an unlimited gift certificate to a restaurant or a clothing store?
• Would you rather have many good friends or one very best friend?
• Would you rather be able to take back anything you say or hear every conversation around you?
• Would you rather be poor and work at a job you love, or rich and work at a job you hate?
• Would you rather have your flight delayed by 8 hours or lose your luggage?
• Would you rather be the star player on a losing basketball team or ride the bench on a winning one?
• Would you rather spend the next year exempt from all taxes or have a one-month paid vacation?