I CAME across an info-graphic providing tips and advises for bosses and employees on creating a mental health friendly workplace. One of the points raised in the said info-graphic is the idea of communicating well. The tip goes simply, “be aware of how you talk with each other.” I was personally struck by this tip primarily because I am a conversationalist. I see the value of communication as it has a power to make or break relationships.
This tip can be understood in two ways. The first one is perhaps creating a more sensitive environment in the way we use our words to communicate with others. In a sense, the way we communicate should come with an awareness of the cultural orientation of the organization or institution that we are part of. While the Westerns have this tendency to be straightforward and blunt in their communication approaches, Asians or Filipinos have the tendency to be non-confrontational. But no matter how we communicate, the words that we speak should come from an awareness that it could have an impact to the person receiving our message.
Bottom line, we need to be careful with our words. A sentence can be composed of just a word or a group of words, but the damage of those words can be eternal. When we were kids, we remember some of the words that the bullies in our school would have called us, the words that our parents might have shouted to us, or even the remarks that our teachers have accidentally uttered as they were in the peak of their emotions. I still remember some of these remarks and like a program that is etched in my brain. No reformatting can ever change the fact that those words were said, some carelessly, some accidentally. Unfortunately, something that we are reminded with the rest of our lives.
The second way of understanding the said tip would be when we failed to communicate at all. While words can hurt, silence can kill. When people try to shy away from sharing their thoughts and communicating their feelings, I believe that this can really be a challenge in the organization.
Because we Filipinos are non-confrontational, I have observed that people have the tendency to talk about the issues on the sides without communicating directly to those concerned. When a real concern comes, there are some people who would rather chitchat with their cubicle mates than reporting or going through the right channels of conversations. This eventually aggravates the scenario, especially when these conversations lead to gossips, to disunity and exclusivity in groups, secrecy, and a growing mistrust to the systems and process of the organization.
In the same manner, others seem to be like by-standers in the organization. Because of the “ulaw” culture that we have, no one bothers or dares to say something or to report on something. While words can hurt, not saying anything neither helps. On the other hand, others seem to be tired of talking because nothing happens anyway.
So, how do we create a mental health friendly workplace? We should be careful with our words and we should have the courage to speak our truth with kindness and even with decency. Perhaps when we talk a lot, the invitation might just be to slow down and be careful with the words that we utter. We should always remember that our words tell us about what’s deep inside our hearts. Likewise, when we do not talk that much in our organizations, challenge yourself to ask a question, raise a concern, and have your voices heard. We need to recognize that we can contribute something. This contribution, however, would not be actualized without you airing your voice.
While this may apply in the workplace, maybe it is about time that we also create mental health friendly families, schools, and even Philippines.