YOU would never think that election year would be as entertaining as sitcoms, telenovelas and beauty tilts. But now you think it can even be a more relaxing than a sitcom, and a great respite from a hard day at the sardine factory where you work.

Unless the factory over-seer allows you to watch some television shows while you pack the sardines in boxes, you will have to make do with the radio replay of interviews with movie stars, beauty queens and presidential candidates.

Click here for stories and updates on the Sinulog 2010 Festival.

Of course you know how beauty tilts proceed. There is a presentation of the candidates, then the evening gown competition, and then the swim suit portion. And who can forget the “let’s test their brains” portion—the question-and-answer routine.

No answer is wrong, so when the candidate tells 10 million people that her favorite hero Wolverine, for example, the judges simply credit points to her for making sense out of her reply.

It’s making sense that really matters. As long as you can defend your answer with wit and clarity, you can get the judges’ nod—or the voters’ yes.

The 2010 elections is turning out to be a “Miss-ter Universe” search and, yes, pun intended. There are six semi-finalists in the race, all male, and they have been presented to the public, who will stand as the judges. Unfortunately, there will be no runners up.

These men have strutted in their “evening gown” wear in their jolly television jingles. They have instant recall, color-coded togs, like yellow, green, and orange.

Yes, their brains have been weighed, picked and dissected in various television discussions and radio interviews or forum.

At one forum, they were given two minutes of “appeal to the emotions of the audience.” (Gee, I still remember lessons from my Argumentation and Debate course in college! My teacher should be proud of me.)

All candidates didn’t beat the buzzer at one forum aimed to educate the public on the direction these presidential wannabes want to take. Well, OK, one was finishing up his speech when the buzzer was pressed.

One soft-spoken wannabe received applause for sounding sincere; one glib candidate seemed too good to be true; another one seemed to have sterling spiritual core but the buzzer gave him no mercy; one just played the joker; another one kept talking about his accomplishments and ditto for another candidate.

So, why is Sira-Sira Store selling packets of politics-candy today? Honey, this is about food. The dude we seat at the Malacañang will determine whether we have three square meals or just a square of land—six feet under.

While these “jokers” entertain us, the joke could be on us, too. We have to choose well.