Saturday, September 22, 2018

Motoomull: Am I a winner or a whiner?


WINNERS always improve things. Whiners do not and they seem to relish in misery. All they do is to air their complaints and perhaps even suggest solutions. They sure have a lot of opinions on how to improve things but they do not take the initiative to make things better. They just sulk, wallow and tell people about how bad things are.

Winners or achievers are not afraid to hustle and they are used to the daily grind. They have the inner drive to see results. And they know that in order to do this, they first have to develop themselves. They need to grow. And so, they embark on a journey of learning and development.

The courage and determination that makes it possible for a winner to continue doing something difficult or unpleasant which is called “grit” has two elements: passion and perseverance. Passion is not only the intensity of one’s interest but rather the consistency of that interest over very long periods of time - years, decades or even a lifetime. On the other hand, perseverance is the ability to carry on through times of frustration, boredom, ambiguity and pain.

Winners or “gritty” people show the following traits:

(a) Focus - if necessary, block out distractions like mobile phones, social media, binging on television series, etc.

(b) Set a stretch goal - something that is beyond one’s reach at present but is attainable with effort.

(c) Seek feedback - while they are happy with the positive feedback, they are also interested in the negative ones so that would know which area they would work on.

(d) Reflect and refine - this stage involves reflecting on what has been learned and what still needs more work and then repeating the deliberate work process again until they’ve achieved their goal.

(e) Winners know their purpose in what they do and their work benefits family, friends, colleagues and community.

There are four types of whiners or complainers:

(a) Groaners - “It’s not fair. I do not deserve this.”

(b) Martyrs - “Nobody appreciates me.”

(c) Cynics - “We will never make it.”

(d) Perfectionists - “Is that the best you can do?”

We all go through difficulties and challenges. Work may not be easy and in many cases, it can be routine and boring. We get bored when we are no longer growing and there are no challenges that face us.

We need to look for challenges outside our work: get a new skill, develop our ability to communicate, join toastmasters, get into sports, learn a new craft and so forth. Our growth is our responsibility. So we stop complaining and start developing. And when we do, a miracle begins to happen, the complaining reduces itself and then the positive results begin to show.

Hopefully every now and then when I’m reminded and you, too, “Am I a winner or a whiner,” we become winners not whiners in our chosen endeavors constantly.