MY MOM’S entire family is Catholic, whereas my dad’s family is Jehova’s Witness. They also have a lot of friends who are Christians. Growing up, I was raised to believe that a person’s faith is a sacred relationship between a person and his/her God. What matters most is what’s in the heart and how this translates to behavior. No matter who we are, even if we go astray, God loves us all.
The past two weeks have been a particularly trying time for my family and I. My husband was hit by a 10-wheeler truck while riding his motorcycle. The fact that he lived through the initial impact and arrived at the hospital lucid and talking is already a miracle in itself. Seeing the love of my life with his shattered right side of the face and multiple injuries throughout his body made me crumble in the emergency room. The first question in my head was: why?
Thankfully, encouraging reading materials were given by friends and colleagues exactly when my heart needed it. Why has been the question reverberating in my head. My husband is a very good man. Even my 6 year old whimpered, “Why is this happening to me, mommy? I think I hate my life.” That broke my heart into a million tiny pieces.
I had to talk to him and my older children to assuage all their fears and anxieties. Let me tell you, one of the hardest things to do is to remain calm and strong, when all you want to do is weep on the floor. I reminded our kids about what I always say, life is not perfect and things always happen for a purpose. We believe in the power of God’s love, He is the driver and we are His passengers. We have to hang onto Him and His promise of grace no matter how tough it becomes. Besides, believing is better than the pitiful alternative!
Through this, all the doctors have one thing in common to say: it is amazing that my husband came out of the impact conscious. People typically die on the spot. I believe his wakefulness alone is a huge blessing. I could have come to the ER to see a vegetable, but instead, I was able to still talk to my man. Up to now, I can still talk to him and he still responds. My children are still able to converse with him. We get to say mutual “I love yous.” I hope and pray he stays this responsive. Please continue to help me storm heaven with prayers as he is still in critical condition. Stay away complications!
Since the accident happened, I have updated on Facebook because I couldn’t keep up with answering everybody who texts, pms, or calls. There are so many people that care, sending support through visits, food, money, and prayers. This experience is very heartwarming and humbling at the same time. My very private husband has actually been the one encouraging me to post updates as a way for us to thank everyone for their love and support.
One of my friends said that it is by God’s grace when a very quiet and private man like my husband shares his testimony. The updates are appreciated because these show a lot of people are praying and prayers are answered. She noted that sometimes we live as if there is no God, and then she thanked me and my family for showing that He is alive.
Several acquaintances I haven’t heard from in decades also sent me a messages stating this gist: that their faith is something they neglected for so long; but, because of the sharing, they find themselves praying so hard again and believing that they, too, will survive their life’s struggles. We truly have one amazing God! He uses all of us as instruments to bring some comfort and healing to each other so that we may become even closer to Him.
I have never trusted only in my own power. I know that what I have and what happens to me are all a part of God’s masterful design. He sees the bigger picture, which my frail human mind cannot. For now, I can only hold onto hope. I also feel terrified, scared, sad, angry, and insert other negative emotions here. But, from the time since this happened, every single moment when I feel as if I have reached rock bottom, He has sent angels in the form of humans to help lift me up.
Why? Because He can. If He brings you to it, He also believes in you and your capacity to get through it. I take lead from my dear husband, who in spite of his multiple injuries, still manages to whisper a thank you to all the medical staff that attends to him when they bring him meds. Do not look for what’s not there but focus on what is actually right there in front of you.