JANUARY is the month of everything new—new gifts and gadgets from the holiday season, and New Year’s resolutions to become better people this coming year. It is usually accompanied by a flurry of activities, probably because the narrative of a fresh year signals the turning of a chapter in our lives.
I have nothing against New Year’s resolutions and have even written about how to turn these resolutions into resolute habits. Change is good; it signals that we are willing to make ourselves temporarily uncomfortable for the sake of personal progress and development. Sometimes, progress doesn’t have to be made by addition—it can be made by subtraction.
Resolutions are often the introduction of a new habit. You want that summer body, so you add exercise three times every week. You want to be more mindful of your spending, so you add a time deposit to put your money away for safekeeping. But sometimes a resolution can involve distancing yourself from a habit, person or object that you know keeps holding you back. And often it’s letting go that is the hardest for people to do.
I had to voluntarily “retire” from video games when I knew that it was getting me nowhere and stunting my growth as an individual. Was it hard? You bet. Most kids now will never understand the attachment a gamer has to his console.
Back in the day when gaming was not as mainstream as it was, you were viewed as a nerd or basement-dwelling weirdo if you would rather PlayStation and Xbox than go outdoors to play. And as cheesy as it sounds, gaming was my therapy.
I was a shy, awkward kid who found delight in level grinding JRPGs because it showed me that effort can beat talent any day of the week. So you can imagine my sadness when I realized that my “escape” was actually stopping me from being a well-developed human.
That was almost seven years ago, and though the nostalgia of playing still hits me sometimes, I have to remind myself that there are just some things that you eventually outgrow and have to be man enough to walk away from.
Sometimes it’s outgrowing friends that continue to stay the same and want you to as well. It’s always painful to sever ties with friends, especially long-term ones, but I know a few brave souls who have made that jump and have improved themselves by leaps and bounds. You are, after all, the sum of the five people that you spend the most time with—so make sure they’re not people who still shirk at responsibilities and #adulting.
I sincerely hope that your resolutions turn into habits as 2019 gets underway. It’s always tough at first—letting go of the familiar and comfortable always is—but nothing worth doing is ever going to be easy.
What are some things you should let go?