OVER the Christmas break, I was conversing with a friend whose son just admitted being depressed. The mother was worried, more like at her wit's end, except that the son is not even within reach as he's out there somewhere taking higher pursuits. So at her wit's end the mother remains.
Having a personal experience of how tragic depression can end, I can imagine what the mother is going through.
But it's Christmas break and there's nothing to do but watch Netflix or browse through social media.
There I saw happy faces in all types of garbs. Families beaming, celebrating. Many wearing matching clothes or the same colors. Some in their thickest winter clothes, others in their most tropical luau attires. There was even one inside a luxury jet with all the trappings of wealth. All beaming, all happy...
That conversation with a distressed mom, however, made me look through the eyes of someone who knows depression and the depths it can drive you to.
How many were browsing through all these, feeling unworthy?
Indeed, my generation is luckier. We grew up and earned our stripes and bravado, unaware of the heights our peers and kin have achieved, except for occasional peeks when we are invited to a gathering or are sent a mail with the latest photo.
Those photos were standard fare. Especially for those in the Isteyts, one photo would be beside a sleek car, another would be a family picture. That was the standard fare: photo beside a car, the most bongga the better, and then the family picture.
These come around once or twice a year. First during a family vacation somewhere -- inside a posh hotel, at Disneyland, or the Niagara maybe, and second at Christmas. At least twice a year, the letters with photos come, and we cheerfully gawk at what the relatives have and then just as happily return to what we have, the memory of the photos quickly filed away in the photo album.
It's different now. We are bombarded everyday with everything. The poses beside a sleek car that come once a year now come almost daily with all other trappings -- sleek car, luxury jet, dream vacation, yummy food, name it, the humble brag is there... from everyone, everyday.
As the unworthy feels more unworthy, the humble braggers get more creative in bragging, and the rest bombard us with their gandang-ganda sa sarili looks.
It was indeed happier in the past as the seasonal letters give us the reason to celebrate the successes of friends and kin and these are much awaited, twice a year. Now we are bombarded, and envy is the prevailing thought, whether as the envious or the inducer.
Think of that as you truly share the joy.