THE girls decide to meet before the big day. Adie & Liz graciously agree to bring up their hosting duties pre-op. I am beyond touched. I never thought I’d have the chance to say this but lucky are those who realize that they are loved while they live.
Because so many of us simply forget that we are loved—more than we will ever know. But thankfully, circumstances sometimes conspire to make us wake up in time before it’s too late.
The last few weeks have been the worst as well as the best weeks of my life.
I found myself in scenes so surreal, I thought I was dreaming. You tell yourself, these things only happen to other people and not to you. And you continue to live in denial till it actually happens to you. But I also never felt luckier—to have the best doctors, the best cheering squads, the best therapists, the best prayer warriors.
When your family, friends, employees, business associates and readers come together to comfort you, to commiserate with you, to pray for you, you really cannot find the words, you just feel this lump in your throat.
My hair stylist even attempted to help me prepare for the big day. She told me I should practice “how to relax.” I looked at her and asked, “How do you do that?” She had no answers for me. But I felt loved.
Single. Childless. And extremely complicated. You’d imagine you’d be alone. I was so wrong. My cup runneth over. The fact is that I am overwhelmed. And I am beyond humbled. I submit to God’s plan. And whatever the outcome, I am grateful—for everything and everyone in my life.
Thank you, girls, for being my best advance Valentine dates ever. I stayed strong for as long as I could. But when I read your messages, I fell apart. Until those very moments, I never really realized how much you all mean to me.
I knew you loved me. I just didn’t know how much. Till now.
And so I thank you, girls, for making me cry but I love you more for making me laugh—for telling me surgical incisions are sexy, for inquiring if my doctor was handsome and for showing me photographic evidence of some guy you want me to hook up with post-op. Seriously?
Girls, you should know that I retired my bikinis two decades ago. So when you asked what kind of incision I’d have, I was speechless. I never asked. I didn’t think it was relevant. I just wanted to come out of this ordeal, alive, well, fully-functioning and able to continue to live a significant life. Sexy was the last thing on my mind.
But I thank you for thinking of me when you found this eligible guy. But what lousy timing! As you know, I will be out of service for a while. I think that’s called God’s will. But I will try to think of your well-meaning attempts to sell me this guy as they wheel me into surgery. I’m sure this will make me smile.
What more can a girl ask—than to feel 22 all over again? If you have faith in my ability to date, at my age, with my reputation, post-op, how can I not have faith in the future?
I know this is love.