Tan: Wise insights in handling friendship and finances

Straight from my heart

Proverbs 6:1-5

FRIENDSHIPS have been broken due to unwise involvement of either party with issues about money. Proverbs 6:1-5 provides how we can wisely handle our finances, preserve friendship, avoiding being hostaged by unwise and unkept promises. The book of Proverbs provides wise guidelines...not dogmatic rules. Wisdom exposes falsehood so we walk in freedom and truth when responding under undue pressure in making promises so we can preserve image without expending authentic intimacy.

We are rebuked by the book of Proverbs when we tend to be indifferent in helping others especially if we have the opportunity to do so...at the same time reminding us that not all mercies are ours to give and providing us space to delay our impulsive, destructive choices in playing the role of a self-appointed Messiah. Unwise choices are useless to repair...what’s done is done. Lord help us to be firm and yet flexible.

1. See the dangers of unwise extension of financial help (vv. 1-2)

What’s at stake here is not just money but a possible breakdown of a long-time friendship or the possible beginning of a beautiful friendship. We really need wisdom in dealing with this.

2. See the deception of making unprayed for promises to help financially (v.3)

Here is a list of the monsters raised when making unwise and un-prayed for promises...it’s about:

· Pride (making it clear that you are the superior one)

· Pressure (manipulating and being manipulated)

· Pretention (appearing to help without counting the cost)

· Politics (an investment for popularity over obscurity)

Take note... “Swallow your Pride! Go and beg to have your name erased.” are two wise actions you can take before the issue becomes complicated.

3. See the deliverance of untainted humility and honesty that admits the impulsiveness to make a promise and the acceptance of limitations of resources (vv.4-5)

“Save yourself like a gazelle escaping from the hunter, like a bird fleeing from a net” Don’t forget the timing in the context of this text is really a call not to delay! It’s a matter of life and long-term consequence of financial breakdown and destruction of a long-time friendship,

The longer I reflect on this issue I realize that it is not really an issue of a friend pressuring us to help them, it’s really an issue of ourselves snaring our self. Lord, deliver us from evil is actually Lord, deliver us from ourselves!

4. See the discernment from the fear of the Lord that delivers us from our indifference to help and the impulsiveness to always help

· Be close to the Wise One

· Be dependent on God for wisdom

· Humbly know and stay in your place and opportunity


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