M: Nelly and Lito are in a relationship for six months now. Her dilemma is that Lito’s ex, Princess, is her best friend. Lito and Princess broke up just two months ago. As you can see, there was an overlap. Princess doesn’t know. Nelly and Lito have been faking their monthsary so Princess wouldn’t find out. Should Nelly come clean to Princess and tell her the truth? My take? What for? So you and Lito can hurt Princess more? I think there are things that are better left unsaid. This includes your “overlapping” relationship with your best friend’s boyfriend, now your boyfriend.
DJ: Princess must have a good taste that Nelly trusts her choices. A bestie’s boyfriend however, as long as they’re together, is off-limits.
M: If there is one thing that happens after a breakup, there is one who has not yet moved on. It may take months or even years before that person can “recover” from a heartbreak. In this case, it’s just been two months since Princess and Lito broke up. As her best friend, I think you have an idea what is going on with Princess. She may even not be totally comfortable yet with the thought that her ex is now your boyfriend. And to drop a bomb that you, her bff and her bf have cheated on her, will most likely let all hell break loose. And you stand to lose your friendship too, unless you know that Princess doesn’t love her boyfriend anymore or she was also seeing someone else while she was still with her ex now your bf. I think you are better off keeping the status quo. Fake your monthsary because frankly, you have been a fake friend!
DJ: Honesty and truthfulness are like the brick and mortar of every relationship. Some friendships can withstand a betrayal. A lot, though, don’t fare so well. Should Nelly tell Princess? I guess it depends what her motivation is. If it’s because the guilt she’s feeling is weighing her down, then she’s just being selfish to place the burden on Princess’s shoulders. Now if it’s because she’s taking responsibility of her own wrong doing, if it’s because she recognizes that this is not what besties do to each other, then perhaps she should tell her and ask for forgiveness. But that is not something she should expect or even demand.
M: I do not like to mince words with those who knowingly or intentionally deceive, double-cross, defraud others. More so when it comes to personal relationships. If you valued your friendship, you would have thought twice, thrice or more before you did what you did to your best friend. Now that you are feeling bad about what you did, coming clean will probably assuage what you feel. But have you thought about what your friend would feel? She deserved your honesty at the beginning. Well, if you tell her now that her relationship has ended long before yours and her ex-bf’s started, I do not foresee a good reaction coming from her, unless she is a saint. But if you want to tell her for whatever your reasons, do it! The good thing that I can see is that Princess will realize that with friends like you and Lito, who needs enemies?
DJ: It’s still Princess’ choice whether to forgive or not. I think if Nelly’s learning her lesson, I wish she’ll have the forgiveness that she’s hoping for. And if she doesn’t, she’ll just have to charge this to experience, learn from it and move on. When she decided to cheat on her, I assume she’s also ready to take the consequences that comes with betraying a friend.