Hate, love and happiness

Photo by Apple Alvarez
Photo by Apple Alvarez

WHAT if you are to battle 500 enemies alone and without weapons? What if you need to save your life in the ocean and you don't know how to swim? What if you want to quit life because everything is hurting? These are my questions as I wake up early at 4 a.m. A lot of faces flashed in my mind, but one face I see vividly, my very good friend and co-teacher Melba Irene Gabuya, RN, MN.

I met her 18 years ago. I cannot remember how it happened, but what is clear to me is her brilliance when she speaks and teaches. She inspired a lot of people when their worlds are collapsing before their eyes. I would like then to share three important reminders she would often tell me. These served as my weapons that I used in battling everyday challenges.

"To hate cannot kill hate, only love can do." What paralyzes the entire world is hatred and what restores it is love. So, if love ends, then eventually war begins. People should then end hate by beginning to have healthy boundaries -- avoid disrespecting others and learn self-respect.

"To restore love after the pains from blame, betrayal, disrespect, foul words and neglect begin with healing from within". If you are pre-occupied with the pain caused by others, then you are authorizing them to incessantly hurt you. Do not allow bitterness to take root and live in misery for the rest of your life.

"To become happy and fulfilled is a personal decision." People have tendencies of allowing others to control their lives -- their choices, attitudes, worth and happiness. It is important then that people should learn to be independent and never give that power over your life to others. Living in joy means living life comfortably by swinging on the dance of detachment-attachment.

I truly believe that in our everyday lives, we must have the wisdom to see which experiences, moments, people and thoughts we should attach and detach from. If we learn right how to battle and how to swim hurting experiences without causing pain to others, I trust that it will lead to heavenly peace and happiness.

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