Friday, December 03, 2021

Lacson: Courtship, marriage, and politics


THE very famous Filipino adage on marriage which goes “Ang pag aasawa ay hindi parang kanin na isusubo kapag napaso ay iluluwa,” is astoundingly a spot-on depiction of the analogy between marriage and politics. Traditional Filipino ideals on relationships and marriage encourage a long courtship, giving the couple enough time to get to know each other before plunging into the life-long vow of staying with one another amidst everything that life will throw at their relationship.

It would be very romantic to deconstruct a couple’s journey to marriage, starting from that distinctive moment of gazing at that person, sensing that fascination and longing to spend more time with this individual with whom we are attracted to. While others would take some time before they realize that they are drawn to someone, it is usual that there is at least one reason that would prompt someone to be interested with another person. It may be a physical attribute, or maybe an attitude that is impressive, or simply a common liking for anything under the sun.

This fascination or attraction would often progress to infatuation, and this would mean the start of the courtship process for guys, if we are to take the old-fashioned and customary style of wooing Filipinas. It is very typical for the gentlemen to make their best efforts of knowing more about the lady they are enamored to, with the desire of pleasing the woman with material things like flowers, chocolates, and the like. Or during the old times, guys would offer their services at the household as a sign of pure and genuine intentions for the woman whom they are pursuing.

During this time, the woman on the other hand, takes advantage of this period to get to know the man as well. This is the time to observe and discern if this man who is showing all this interest and making all these efforts is someone who is responsible, dependable, and trustworthy. Well, if both are already physically attracted to one another, then it becomes a little bit quicker for both to consider the chances of being in a relationship. In our country’s context, which is a predominantly Catholic nation, being in a relationship is frequently synonymous with exclusive dating, meaning that someone who has a boyfriend/girlfriend is no longer allowed to date others. This stage in the courtship cycle is somehow regarded as the preparation stage for the next level of relationship which is marriage. This means that, once you decide to get married to this particular individual, you are sure that you have exhausted all means to know the in and out of this person, because after being married, there is definitely no turning back.

This is the palpable scene related to the upcoming 2022 National Elections―much like of what a normal courtship setting looks like. There is someone who woos, and there is someone being wooed. As the voting public, we must look for the things that we would look for in a boyfriend or a husband, as a father who is expected to be the stronghold of the family. As much as we are scrupulous to the matters of courtship and marriage, so must we when we decide to write the name of the person we think should occupy the highest seat in our degrading nation. Just the same as marrying someone, once we have chosen this candidate, we MUST stick it out with him/her through thick and thin.


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