SOMETIMES it is hard to fix the misunderstandings we brought to our loved ones. I have always been the “fixer of broken hearts” for years. When my mom is in pain, I find time communicating with her. When my sister Ann is quite upset, I make sure she is comforted. And when my friends are angry, I do not add to the fire, but I make sure I am balanced.
But lately, I have caused pain to my loved ones unconsciously. My mom asked for my help days ago, and I did not say no. The request was not that hard; I would only need to be the bridge between my mom and my cousin. And then, I need the help of my husband Rey to help me visit my cousin.
But I blew up the day due to a misunderstanding, to cut the story short. And we were not able to join them in a sumptuous lunch they all had prepared because I did not hear the plan correctly. Yes, honestly, I was in bad shape that day; I was able to sleep for only two hours, which may have contributed to my mistake of not finding the right words to express my thoughts to my loved ones.
And at the end of the day, when I needed to contemplate how my day transpired, I realized I had hurt people who were very precious to me, my mom, my sister, and my husband. I admitted that I did all wrong, and it is not easy to accept my explanations, even if they carry the truth. And that disturbs me to see others in pain when they do not deserve it.
I wonder why even if we tell the truth, some will still disbelieve? It is so difficult when we would like to explain the fact that we can set everything free, but then others can stick to their rigid beliefs and are not open to the truth. They mistakenly perceive others to dislike them when these people genuinely love them.
I do not rediscount the feelings of getting hurt so bad; I know how that feels; God, we cannot almost breathe. But in my life, I always look back on the relationship built for years. Can we think about the past when we were almost drowning due to frustrations or illnesses? Maybe that person you cannot forgive is the only person who saved you that time. Yes, it is not easy to forgive and then forget or vice versa. But we do not know what will happen next in our lives. What if today is the last time we will be able to see the person we have loved, then hated much? Oh, I think we would not like that to happen in our lives.
Although I believe that pain needs time to heal, waiting for that to come would not mean adding up to the present distress. I understand that faking the pain accompanied by hidden anger will not be easy. But I plead that whenever we think somebody has put us in vain, let us, please open our hearts to know the truth about it. Because we might be indifferent to others who have a clear conscience and that the fault is due to misunderstandings brought by others. Ahh... That is why I am honest and humble to accept my mistake. I am sorry, Mommy, Sister Ann, and husband Rey.