In prayer, is it right to persist in asking God for the same thing over and over again, or should we rather submit to his will when we do not receive what we’ve been asking for? This appears to be a difficult question because both options seem to be valid on Biblical grounds. Jesus taught us to be persistent when we pray, but he also taught us to always submit to God’s will.
In Luke 11:5-13 we read a parable about a man repeatedly knocking at this friend’s door at midnight, asking for bread. The friend was at first hesitant to open the door because it is already locked and his children are asleep. But because the man kept on knocking, this friend rose up and gave the man what he needed, not because of their friendship but because of the man’s persistence. Jesus continued to tell us that if we who are sinners know how to give good gifts to our children, then the more that our heavenly Father will give good things to us, his children; in fact, he will even give us the Holy Spirit. His instruction, coupled with a promise, was: “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks, receives; and the one who seeks, finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened” (Matthew 7:7-8). We can thus be persistent in prayer because Jesus taught us so.
But when we do not receive our petitions and requests, should we rather just stop praying for them and accept the fact that God will not grant them? In 2 Corinthians 12:7-9, Paul, on three occasions, begged the Lord to remove his “thorn in the flesh,” but three times, too, the Lord did not do as Paul requested. God’s answer to Paul was, “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is made perfect in weakness.” In the story of Jesus’ agony in the garden of Gethsemane (Matthew 26:36-46), our Lord, too, prayed for three times that the cup of suffering – his passion and death – be removed from him, if possible, but the Bible tells us that he was crucified just as prophesied. Are these examples of cases where persistence in prayer should be supplanted by submission to God’s will?
Sometimes, hard as it may be to understand, the answer is yes. Nevertheless, we can be assured that our persistence in prayer is not ever wasted, because God always answers us when we call upon him. It is just that the answer may be a “yes,” a “no,” or a “wait.” Whichever of the three, we only have to trust that God’s answer will always be what is best for us. And what is best for us is that answer which is aligned with God’s will. As what 1 John 5:14 teaches us, “And we have this confidence in him, that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us.” The Bible tells us that his will is based on what is good, and what glorifies God. If we ask for anything that is evil, or which does not give God the glory and honor that he deserves, we should not insist that God give it to us. We should not act like spoiled children asking God for something that he, in his perfect knowledge, knows will harm or destroy us – may be not now, but in the future, and that includes eternity.
God knows everything even before it happens; he has complete and full knowledge of the future. He said, “I am God, there is no other; I am God, there is none like me. At the beginning I declare the outcome; from of old, things not yet done. I say that my plan shall stand, I accomplish my every desire” (Isaiah 46:9b-10). And his plan about us is expectedly better than our plan for our very own selves. “For I know well the plans I have in mind for you—says the Lord—plans for your welfare and not for woe, so as to give you a future of hope” (Jeremiah 29:11).
So, should we be persistent in asking God for something we need or want? Yes, and yes, until God says otherwise.