SOON after the deaths of Omar Maute and Isnilon Hapilon on the early morning of October 16, combat operations in Marawi City fwas finally terminated, signaling the end of "war" after 5 months of brutal fighting.
But even now, tears well up in Mary Jane Apao’s eyes every time she hears the word ‘Marawi’ as she remembers the nightmare.
Apao had lost her husband, Sergeant Philip Apao of the 5th Mechanized Infantry Battalion, Philippine Army, in an airstrike last May 31.
Sgt. Apao was part of a group of soldiers assaulting extremists’ positions when he was killed.
It was the 8th day of fighting following the seizure of the predominantly Muslim city by ISIS-inspired extremists.
Six months after the death of her husband, Mary Jane and Philip’s family are still having difficulties accepting the soldier’s death especially since he and the other 10 government troopers were killed by what the military calls ‘friendly fire’.
Mary Jane is not blaming anyone, not even the government, because she understands it was an accident. But she and her late husband’s family still want to be enlightened by what really happened.
“Hindi siya namatay sa kalaban, namatay siya sa kasamahan niya sa airstrike. Madaling matanggap kung namatay sa kalaban (He was not killed by the enemy but by friendly forces in an airstrike. It is easier to accept if he was killed by the enemy),” she said.
According to Mary Jane, the war in Marawi was not her husband’s first time to go into combat. Philip had been in military operations in Jolo and other parts of Mindanao against various rebel groups.
Mary Jane recalled she was talking with Philip on the phone for one hour in the morning of May 31. Minutes after their long conversation, she received a text message, informing her that her husband was hit by a bomb.
“Nung nag-usap kami, sinabi niya sa mga bata ‘Mga anak, huwag magpasaway sa Mama nyo, magpakabait kayo. Hindi ako makapaniwala (When we were talking, he told our children not to be hard-headed and to always respect their mother. I could not believe the news of his death),” Mary Jane said.
She went straight to St. Peter’s Chapel in Iligan City after being told of Philip’s death.
“Mainit pa siya pagdating ko, parang kamamatay lang niya. Sobrang sakit (He was still warm when I arrived. It was so painful) ,” she added.
She said it is especially painful when their two sons, aged 6 and 4 years old, ask about their father.
“Mahirap lalo na kung sasabihin ng mga bata ‘Ma, nami-miss ko na si Papa, mabubuhay pa ba siya’? Ang hirap sagutin (It is hard especially when the children ask, ’Ma, I miss Papa, will he come back to life’) ,” Mary Jane said.
About her husband, Mary Jane said Philip was a very good and responsible head of the family.
They had met at the market in 2010 when Philip and his troops were doing the usual weekly marketing for the troops.
Her family was selling meat in the market; Philip’s group was their customer.
They exchanged contact numbers and she was eventually courted by the soldier through text. They became a couple through text and it was in the same way that she heard about her husband’s death.
Widowed by the war, Mary Jane said she has fulfilled her wedding promise ---’Till Death Do Us Part’.
Unlike Mary Jane, Minhati Madrais only got to know of the death of her husband through the news.
Madrais, an Indonesian, is 36 and a teacher by profession.
Madrais is the widow of Omar Maute, one of the top leaders of the ISIS-inspired Maute terrorist group which instigated the fighting in Marawi City.
Omar was killed in an offensive operation early dawn on October 16, together with Hapilon, the Abu Sayaff leader and the anointed ‘emir’ of ISIS in Southeast Asia.
Following her husband’s death, Madrais was arrested in her rented house in Barangay Tubod, Iligan City on the morning of November 5 by virtue of Arrest Order Number 1, issued by the Department of National Defense, for rebellion.
She was allegedly the Alias Baby in the arrest order but Madrais denies it.
“I am not Baby; I don’t know Baby,” she told authorities during her inquest proceedings.
Authorities allegedly recovered from Madrais’ house some bomb-making materials and she was taken into custody by the Iligan City Police Office together with her six children-- four girls aged 12, 10, 7 and 6, and two boys aged 2 and 10 months old.
Madrais allowed herself to be interviewed at the ICPO headquarters but requested not to be asked questions about what happened in Marawi City.
In broken English and Tagalog, she said she prefers not to give her reaction about the war because she knows many have been devastated by what happened.
But she seemed to be very inspired when she talks about her husband Omar.
Minmin, as her family called her, said she met Omar when she was studying at Al Azar University in Egypt. They got married after their graduation in 2003
“We have one university but girls and boys are separated,” Madrais said.
She immediately liked Omar because he was a tall guy and he respected girls in the university, she said.
All their married life, she said she could not remember of any ‘sad moments’.
“All are happy moments,” she said.
Omar, she said, was her first and last boyfriend.
She said their marriage was not ‘arranged’ but was based on their love for each other. Omar’s parents even went to Indonesia to see her parents and to ask for her hand.
On their wedding in Egypt, only her parents went to join them.
Omar, according to Madrais, was also a very religious person. She learned to pray regularly and read the Qur’an because of Omar.
She also described her late husband as loyal to her. When asked how many wives Omar had, “Ako lang. Alam ko, ako lang,” she confidently said.
She said she doesn’t have regrets being Omar’s wife despite the situation. Omar did not stay with her in Marawi City but stayed in Butig
“No regrets because I have my six children,” she said.
Now that she is detained for the charges of illegal possession of explosives, she prays her family in Indonesia will get her children and take care of them.
Aside from her children, she is also worried about the situation of her mother-in-law, Farhana Romato Maute, the mother of Omar, who is now in a detention cell in Manila.
“She is the only family in Marawi I know who loves me and my kids,” she said.
Madrais is currently in custody at the ICPO.