I DO not like chocolates.
I am not allergic, I just don't like how it tastes - not even tempted at the sight of it. And each time, someone discovers this quirky fact about me; they just give me the "judging you/stop being pretentious" look. But could I really have any good enough reason not to like everyone's favorite guilty pleasure?
Yes.
I grew up in a family who sees the idea of working abroad as a gateway to live a better life, just like how it goes for most families here in the Philippines.
Back when we were younger, my family gave us the privilege to not think of money and the amount of hard work one has to make just to get some. They decided that we have to experience being a child, and being a kid to them would mean being carefree, a little brat, and extravagant sometimes. The adults will have to do all the work while we should only care about being a kid, that’s what they always tell us.
To fulfill this thinking, they sought of the opportunity to work overseas. Though, it’s far from home - of family and friends and everything they have grown accustomed to, the benefits they will get weighs equal with such sacrifice to be alone in a foreign land.
Two of my aunts, who I am very close with, went overseas for work. Mommy Elvis, my mother’s younger sister, left her teaching job in Davao City to work as an OFW in Hong Kong around late 2000. It was the hype of moving abroad -- we’ve seen it, everyone who took the risk came back with a fortune. Their wooden ancestral houses were replaced with concrete walls, towering houses, and Chevrolets. My other aunt, Tita Gelyn, a registered nurse who also wants to see some improvements in our lives joined the bunch and went to Saudi Arabia seven years after Mommy Elvis left.
It all felt so sudden, we were not that emotional when we were parting because we saw things differently then. But soon after, I remember feeling sad because the two of them were such great helpers in my school assignments, projects, and activities. That was what I first thought of and as the days passed by, I realized there’s a hole in my heart and it’s been growing since they left. I knew they were missing us as well. I also remember getting excited over writing letters for the holidays - that we hope they were with us so we could spend it full of happiness. They compensate their absence through sending Balikbayan boxes.
There was a time when we received Balikbayan boxes each month. Each filled with branded bags, clothes, shoes, and chocolates - all sorts: bars, chips, cookies, cakes, nibblers, fondue, etc.
The more years sent working abroad meant more money in the bank, and yes bigger boxes. Our refrigerators would be filled with chocolates and all sweet stuff each time I open it and it overflows on the holidays because apparently, malls abroad have big sales especially on Christmas.
Those were good memories as a child.
Now that I’m a grown up myself and I already have a few nieces and nephews to take care of, I feel like it’s already my turn to go. And I don’t think I’m prepared to be away. Just the thought of being miles apart from home and never to come back for years sound like a really sad story to me.
The other week, I met up with my friend Elaine, who I’ve never seen for two years. She went to Dubai to be a photographer of this huge make-up chain. We thought her life was all glitz and glamour as reflective of what she posts on social media. But as she was telling me what it’s like during her first few months there -- that she would sleep with her baggage by her feet on top of the bunk bed in a room with other strangers because she couldn't yet afford a decent flat, that she would rather stay inside that room all alone on her day off so she could save money for her family, that she misses to hang-out with friends but there are none near, that it was sad being alone for years, I thought otherwise.
We didn’t end up the talking by being sad, we’re not that kind of people. She said the one thing that turns everything the other way is the happy feeling she gets when she can afford to buy everything in her family’s wish list, that there’s enough money in the bank that money is not something they would worry about.
“It’s a nurturing experience,” she said.
We ended with a chuckle. She handed me a lipstick and a Toblerone then encouraged me to go with her so we could go shopping together and avail of the free make-ups her company gives.