BEWARE the Negatron

- My youngest son is pretending to maim Megatron. Nobody likes a “kontrabida” in their lives...even kids know this. Do yourself a favor and come to the good side.
- My youngest son is pretending to maim Megatron. Nobody likes a “kontrabida” in their lives...even kids know this. Do yourself a favor and come to the good side.

ENTER the Negatron! We’ve all got them, yeah. You know, the negative joy-suckers...the people who suck the life out of the room, the great pretenders, the bitter inggiteras, the self-righteous know-it-all, the pinaglihi sa sama ng loob, the glass always empty drama queens, and/or the people who invade both our physical and mental space with their forever issues. Sometimes, they don’t just belong to the friends category, but they are family too, so cutting ties become virtually impossible. We have been bound by blood to love them...but it’s like really, really, really super hard. Ugh!

I cannot grasp why some people feel they are better than others, choose to be dishonest, dwell on the negative, keep complaining, and spread hate when it is so much easier to just extend a smile, spread good vibes, and give love. It takes more effort to be a jerk! I do realize that not everyone is programmed the same way due to differences in upbringing and life struggles. However, there really are some special people who thrive on making others feel miserable. It’s as if they feed on the negativity to make them feel good.

The other day, I saw a hoity-toity pa-soshal (note there’s a diff between that and a real soshalera) woman denigrating a poor waiter for being too slow. I couldn’t help but cringe! Nagmukhang fake ang Hermes mo, Teh. No amount of trying-hard-English can hide your terrible attitude and bad manners reeking of the palengke. Palengkera! How you treat people, especially those at the bottom ranks, say a lot about your character. Things can always be said nicely and be handled maturely. The moment you lose your cool, you’ll only end up embarrassing yourself. Ang pikon talo! And as they say, karma is digital now. You wouldn’t want to be in a trending viral video whilst in your bad behavior.

On FB, we see these Negatrons flood our newsfeeds with endless posts complaining about pointless stuff, rumor-mongering, immaturely criticizing, etc. The best is when some people make “parinig”, some even with passive-agressive quotations, clearly fishing for attention so that someone will ask what that blind item status update is all about. Social media is a real game changer, not just in terms of communication, but because it has changed the standards of decorum. When someone doesn’t agree, you can see people ranting and responding easily with “this is my wall, I can say whatever I want; leave if you don’t agree.”

See, you may have your own wall, but everything that you post in there are part of public domain. If you can’t handle any reactions (rude replies notwithstanding) then don’t post anything so people can’t comment. It’s like being in the elevator and I suddenly fart. Everyone complains that it stinks! And I respond...I am in my space so I can fart whenever I want and leave if you don’t want to smell it. Duh. If you can’t take it, don’t dish it. Friendly, respectable exchange of ideas should always be welcome because we can also learn from other people.

These Negatrons really abound in social media now known as trolls. They brandish their keyboards like weapons of mass destruction, hiding under the cloak of anonymity. It is very easy for them to bash, bully, and attack because they are behind computers. Some people are so

emboldened to write whatever they want. They can’t say it to your face, but they have the guts to post it. Sadly, we just feed these people’s egos when we engage them.

The best solution to combat Negatrons for both the real and virtual world is to stay away from them because they enjoy and thrive in these kinds of controversy. To protect our spirit from contamination due to their negative attitude, it is for the best to limit our exposure. Also, be very wary of people whose words don’t match their actions! Luckily, we can all easily clean our FB newsfeed by unfollowing those who are just too toxic. Real life friends who are dishonest, who manipulate you, who have no word of honor, who put you down, etc. should be avoided.

However, there are some people in our existence that we can’t abruptly cut ties with. But know this—we may not be ready to completely kick a few people out of our lives just yet, but we can kick their issues to the curb. We can choose not to engage and tune out the drama. Just keep in mind that acting in anger will only make things more complicated. Being cordial and polite doesn’t mean you’re plastic. It just means you’re mature enough to co-exist peacefully in spite of the differences.

We will all encounter difficult people and situations, at some point. They all come for a season and a reason. Personally, my initial response is to kill with kindness because no one is perfect; and so if all else fails, I can say I did my best before saying my final parting shot and then walking away. I believe every act of kindness rekindles the spirit and nourishes the soul. So we win! If anything, these Negatrons help us grow into better people with more patience, fortitude, and understanding.

We all have the same 24 hours in a day, and once time goes by, we can no longer get it back. It’s vital to be choosy regarding who we give our precious time to. Remember: people inadvertently reveal their character in the company they keep and the company they choose to avoid. Let us surround ourselves with positive people who add color and value to our days. It is perfectly okay if we set high standards for our life and the people we allow to be a part of it.

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