Valle: On being positive

I WAS beside myself with discomfort as the lady masseur started to rub oil over my legs. Even in the dim light, I saw her big tummy telling me that she is pregnant, a thought that she herself confirmed in the affirmative when I asked her.

She was a few weeks along the family way, and yet, she’s still doing hard work so very late at night, a thing that was unthinkable for me because, having gone through four full pregnancies myself, I would have rested all day long without much prodding.

Despite my resolve to keep my wonderings to myself, I was unable to resist engaging her with a little chat over her situation which she succinctly and matter-of-factly described as a “normal routine” as she and her other child had to survive each day. “Maging positive na lang para mabuhi,” (I must be positive to survive) she said of her situation…

Having a massage is not exactly my cup of tea as I would always cringe at the pressure on my muscles however light the kneading is done on me. Most often, I would just oblige a friend and accompany him when he felt the need to have a full body massage after some heavy physical work to ease body malaise. That is why I was quiet worried for the pregnant masseur who seems to have no choice but do the work.

Then I started to wonder about her situation, why she had to sacrifice so much just to earn her keep, knowing full well that I could not bring myself to ask her about the male partner.

So I had to listen very well, even to the silence between her responses to my query. Still, I find myself revolted by the irony in women’s situation. And I thought: here I am letting this hapless girl ease my pain while she herself could be undergoing some kind of unrecognized agony.

At eight months into the pregnancy, a woman should be fully rested in preparation for the expected child birth anytime soon. My friend and personal OB-Gyne, Dr. Darlene Estuart whom I always hold in high esteem for her professionalism, used to remind me when I had my unica hija to be extra careful at eight month. It was said that the survival of a fetus at this stage is critical, thus, all precautions need to be done to avoid a miscarriage.

That’s why I asked the masseur if she was sure that she will be okay because I knew how tedious it was to do massage. And I thought if I always felt the discomfort of massage with the constant rubbing and kneading, how much more for the one who does the massage. She would have to exert not just the physical pushing of her hands and whole body, against my muscles, but she would have to give every ounce of strength that she possesses to satisfy the relaxing comfort needed by her client.

Thus even when I was almost at the point of asking her why she had to do all these things, I have kept my peace and thank her for all her effort and time, even as I can’t contain my deep appreciation for this mother who will do everything in her power to feed her family. For me she is a gem that is hidden in the dim lights who could not contain her brightness to shine through.