Eugenio: Dwelling on what-ifs

Start with clarity
Judith Eugenio
Judith EugenioFile photo

Have you ever wanted to go back and redo something? You are not alone. With hindsight, people eventually realize what the best courses of action were. Nonetheless, there is nothing one can do about it, but knowing that does not free us from its clutches.

Knowing the right path too late torments us daily until it consumes our thoughts. Luckily, in my line of work, there is always a way to know the best path for each of us.

In my profession, there is a concept known as Heaven Luck. It is a factor of Human Success and deals with the innate traits of a person. When one knows oneself, the best course of action is within our grasp. Additionally, Heaven Luck can warn us of potential obstacles, allowing us to adapt and react. Knowing what to do in the moment is tough, but with preparation, it won’t be as difficult.

Another important factor of Human Success is Man Luck. This refers to the hard work and preparation one undergoes to achieve what one wants. For example, if a person is quick to anger, practicing Man Luck would be doing exercises to control that anger. A lot of the time, many of the actions that can’t be taken back were said during heightened emotions. By taking our time to work on ourselves and our reactions, the answers will appear more clearly to us.

While wanting a redo is often just a passing thought, I can understand if people genuinely desire a redo. If one could redo things perfectly, who wouldn’t want a do-over? However, all of us have a plan for who one is supposed to be. If one would had a redo, one would never have learned the lessons required to understand what truly needed to be done. With this in mind, I believe it’s better to focus on improving our current situation rather than dwelling on what could have been.

“A person who suffers before it is necessary, suffers more than necessary” is a quote that resonates with me and sort of relates to this. One dwells too much on what-ifs and what could have beens that what is and what can be are forgotten. It is never bad to grieve what one lost due to one’s indiscretion, but at some point, one must stand up and continue to move forward. Maybe no one will ever get the desired redo, but at the end of the day, as long as the mistake doesn’t get a redo, that’s all that matters.

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