Every time we take a road trip to the north or south of Cebu, we always try to visit as many spots along the way. Our final destination is usually the ocean. As would be expected with our hot and humid climate, when we head for the beach, we are decked out in as little as possible.
But invariably, we find ourselves inside a church.
Not too long ago, we took some guests on a road trip. I was wearing a halter top that left my shoulders bare. So, when I entered a certain part of the church, I was handed a shawl, which I took without objection or offense. This church, however, didn’t have a problem with shorts.
On the way back to the city, we stopped by another church. This time, I passed the dress code. My niece, however, who was in shorts, was given a shawl to wrap around her waist to cover up her legs. She obliged, as requested.
We noticed, however, that my niece’s boyfriend, who is a six-footer and who was also in shorts, was allowed to display his supremely long legs for everyone to see. We couldn’t help but raise our eyebrows.
It seemed misogynistic that only women had to cover up while men were allowed to display themselves.
Hearing our distress, my niece’s boyfriend vowed that, in solidarity with us women, the next time we encountered such double standards, he would voluntarily cover his legs with a shawl, as well.
It seems ironic that a church that preaches inclusivity, compassion and understanding would enable discriminatory practices. If God could speak, would He not prefer that everyone be allowed inside His house regardless of what they wore as long as their hearts were sincere?
Churches are entitled to set rules for entry but double standards have no place in the house of God. Let there be rules, but let the rules, especially a dress code, be uniform for all, regardless of gender.
I once attended a wedding rehearsal wherein the officiating priest asked us, women, if what we would be wearing would be “tempting.” I was tempted to retort with some wisecrack. But out of respect for the couple celebrating the milestone, I held back.
Women know that dress codes are gendered because of society’s desire to control them. But do people really think so low and little of themselves that they actually believe they need shields like robes for women to cover themselves up, to protect them from sin?
I have no beef with dress codes for places of worship. But whether these dress codes dictate no exposed knees, shoulders, stomachs or necklines, let the dress code apply to all, regardless of gender.
When rules are gendered, every person’s gender must now be determined which by itself, is already discriminatory. Of what relevance, after all, is one’s gender when entering a church except in application of gendered rules for entry?
I don’t think God stood proud during those moments when identification cards were being demanded from those who simply sought to enter His house to pay Him a visit.