I MISSED my Friday column last week. The Sanchez sibs have a grand reunion of sorts. My Kuya and his family flew in from the US of A and my younger brother Ramon and his wife, Dotee from Hong Kong. And me from Bacolod.
It has been years since we last met. In my case, since 2005 when I visited Kuya who is now a retired civil engineer and lives in retirement in Maryland. Their kids have left their nest to be in their own homes.
We had a troubled relationship, Kuya and I. As a human rights advocate, I look at everyone as my equal, be they rich or poor, male or female, or people with different skin color.
In his case, he views people based on their skin. Like many Fil-Ams, they dislike the “Egoys,” the African-Americans. He finds it hard to accept that black people are good and bad.
I have to thank my charismatic lessons in the Prayer and Life Workshop and my experiences as a court-annexed mediators to change my worldview.
God has shown me what it means to have a free will. I have my choices, Kuya has his. As my blood brother, I love him.
But I cannot impose my views and values on him, as he can his views on me. Where can we find common grounds, while respecting his different opinions?
We are children of Benedicto M. Sanchez Sr. and Senen Quito Sanchez. Both Kuya and I grew up in the same home, raised as Catholic, even went to the same Catholic school. We diverged in college, as he took an engineering course in a different school while I took a social course at the state university.
That must account for something as we grew older. As a charismatic, I have to look at God, at my Kuya – and at myself.
As a charismatic Catholic Christian, I have to learn how to be humble, accepting of other people, including the views that are different from mine. God alone has the right to judge. Definitely not me.
I spiritually prepared myself for that encounter. Be humble. Accepting. Respectful. And most of all, loving of myself and others.
I have to rein in my judgmental attitude. My intellectual arrogance. Divisiveness, of the “me” and the “them.”
To cut a long narrative short, humility is answered by humility. Respect with equal measure of respect. And yes, with love.
Thank You, Father Abba for granting me the grace of reconciliation that our Brother and Jesus have showered with grace. Whatever happens next, I know I have attained peace, I have reconciled with my Kuya.
(bsanc@yahoo.mail)